Sunday, May 9, 2021

8989 Redstone, When HGTV Goes Paranormal

So sad...the beautiful die so horribly...even in real life. Sultry actress Jen Oda. Related to a real Japanese Shogun, Ms. Oda was felled by her husband in a murder/suicide as she planned a divorce. In today's feature, Ms. Oda plays a producer for an HGTV type renovation/flip show. She'll be beset by evil spirits in an old Detroit mansion as the entity becomes homicidal. As the HGTV offerings get increasingly boring (bring back "Fixer Upper!"), perhaps 2016's "8989 Redstone" offers the network clues on how to put some spice back in their program line-up. Directed by Jay Chapman, this horror yarn can boast of much gore and some impressive cheese.

Mastering Disaster is a reno/flip show hosted by Darryl (Eric Allan Kramer) and his slutty daughter, Rebecca (Lindsay Bushman). The show is produced by the very promiscuous Jo (Oda), who loves pre-marital sex with the crew. This show will feature an old Detroit mansion. Weird stuff begins happening from the outset and the nubile and scantily clad Rebecca begins having weird hallucinations. Rebecca seems to get drawn into the paranormal elements of the house and begins having awful nosebleeds. Darryl has problems keeping crew members including his contractor. They are all getting spooked.  He'll even bring in Buddhist monks to do an exorcism...which won't go well.

As a ghostly presence gets violent and dispenses more crew in a very gory manor, Darryl believes Jo is responsible.  The show host believes Jo is trying to spice up the ratings by throwing in a haunted element to this renovation show. Uh oh...the ghost of the house's original owner (Robb Derringer) appears to Rebecca and when he does, the beauty goes into a deep trance.  Doors to nowhere appear, intestines appear, and a haunted mirror all are used for some classic chills. As Jo gets friskier, so does Rebecca...and the crew members are benefiting from that. Now the blood will flow more intensely, limbs will be chopped off, and Rebecca's underwear selection will get more deviant. 

Will any of the beauties in this film survive this vicious haunting? Would Chip and Joanna Gaines have known what to do if the electrical system was fried by a century old ghost? Just what is behind those doors to nowhere that mysteriously appear? This is a gory one and both Ms. Bushman and Ms. Oda turn in alluring and energetic performances.  For a good time when the HGTV offering fails to deliver, see "8989 Redstone."

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