Saturday, September 21, 2019

Exists, The Bigfoot Project

Bigfoot never shows up at Yankees games or July 4th fireworks celebrations. In all fairness, do we need to show up in his wooded lair? Fairness is an elusive concept to us humans, subject to weird interpretations in a world where every silly thought is given value and meaning. This is all fine and good...except when a ticked off monster is the final arbiter. Hence we look at 2014's "Exists," directed by Eduardo Sanchez ("The Blair Witch Project").
Ticked off? That may be an understatement. Five jerks...I mean twenty-somethings ride into the woods of east Texas. They're silly and amorous and pre-marital sex, alcohol...and probably marijuana are their only goals. They will even get into some skinny-dipping. During a pitch-black night, Matt (Samuel Davis) the driver, hits something in the road. A deer? Yeah right. The quintet carries on to a run down cabin. Brian (Chris Osborn), the fifth wheel and GoPro guy (he's filming everything) believes he has seen and heard something in the woods. Because he's a fifth wheel, he'll sleep outside in a hammock as the nubile Liz (Denise Williamson) and hunk Todd (Roger Edwards) have pre-marital sex in a bedroom.
The aforementioned Matt and Dora (Dora Madison) will occupy another bedroom. Brian continues to hear weird noises and the morning arrives. No one listens to Brian and the lonely Brian sneaks into the woods to film Liz and Roger having more pre-marital sex. While capturing his two amorous pals having sex, Brian spies something else...Bigfoot!!!  All subtlety is tossed out the window by Mr. Sanchez here as the huge hairy beast begins attacking. He puts a tree through the car and savages the cabin. Scared, but still alive, the twenty-somethings send Matt on a bike to reach the highway...bad idea. Bigfoot returns and continues his attacks and penetrates the cabin. Not all will survive this attack and the survivors are now on the run near Bigfoot's lair. The hairy thing has them just where he wants them now, and Matt? You'll see.
Bigfoot's temper is hostile and the twenty-somethings will pay a dear price. This found-footage film shows us a slaughter and from the outset we know some great looking east Texans will die horribly. Will any of these babes or hunks survive the Bigfoot onslaught? Does Bigfoot have any special plans for the nubile Liz and Dora? Just what caused this Bigfoot's wrath in the first place? This is another ominous and vicious tale with an evil a lot less ambiguous than the witch in Mr. Sanchez' first film. For some nice Bigfoot carnage, enjoy "Exists."

1 comment:

  1. They say everything is bigger in Texas, wonder how Big Foot takes his stake?