Saturday, February 22, 2020

Bachelor Party Massacre, Guys and Strippers Die Horribly

Why do dancers die so horribly in these films? Perhaps in a misogynistic society where male domination insists on ladies of the night and denying them collective bargaining rights,  this is just inevitable. Nurses and stewardesses don't die this horribly and in this great a number... okay, so maybe they do. But stewardesses and nurses are unionized so at least they are smartly dressed when they are slashed and dissected. Today we take a look at 2006's "Bachelor Party Massacre," directed by Schumacker Halpern Overdrive (really). This film has a humongous kill total, and no stripper... er exotic dancer will fare well.
A sultry blonde murders her dad and his exotic dancer mistress and is sent away for life. After a bloody escape she descends on the town of Alpine and in a very gratuitous slashing scene, cuts up pretty blonde stripper Val (Lesley Patterson). Val was going to work a bachelor party so the killer takes her place. Addison (Michael Capes) is a hunk who is engaged to Lisa (Kate Huffman). His three amigos are throwing him the party at a closed down bar. Carl (Joshua Breeding) is his brother and Mark (Kyle Powers) and Paul (Eric Von Doymi) are his buds. After meeting them we desire that this quartet die horribly.
Two strippers arrive, Erin (Zoe Taylor) and Jennifer (Jamie Marie). They strip and do a lot of lap dances. The killer is also present and she will get busy. Her kills are bloody and vomit inducing, literally. Mark will die first in a pile of his own vomit. The beautiful killer has a big knife, an ax, and will also use a stiletto heel as a weapon. The beautiful will die in humiliating fashion and the hunks will be... well, you'll see. The body count will sky rocket quickly, just in time for Lisa and Carl's wife (Monica Marie Johnson) to show up. The more the merrier for our killer who is hearing voices and wants everyone to die with much gore.  As strippers and hunks fall, our sultry slasher gets more unwound.
Is there no end to the disrespectful and misogynistic depiction of ladies of the night in our movies? Will our sultry killer be stopped by any of the hunks or their wives? Would nurses or stewardesses fared better against the insane blonde than our ill-fated exotic dancers? This is an ambitious horror film with a few more kills than usual. For a nice time on movie night, take in "Bachelor Party Massacre."

1 comment:

  1. OH the joys of our fair sex, they are so encompassing unlike some other recent movements that are out to cut any kind of male pleasure.