Friday, November 22, 2019

Plaguers, Space-Babes vs. Space-Zombies

There exists a small number of perfect plot lines. Here's one: Four sultry space pirates, dressed in stewardess outfits which include silver go-go boots, hijack another spaceship, which also has space-babes, and end up in a war against mutant space-zombies. Yes! Do you really need to know anymore? There will be a ravishing nympho-psycho pirate into torture, a Rhona Mitra look-a-like pirate, and a nubile blonde space captain bent on saving her ship from the evil babes and the evil zombies. Hence 2008's "Plaguers."
The aforementioned nubile blonde, Holloway (Alexis Zibolis), has taken over as captain after the death of her fiance captain (don't worry, he'll emerge later). She's inexperienced and when a distress signal comes in from the USS Diana, she bites. Babes radio Holloway's ship begging for help. Holloway docks with the ship...mistake! Oh yes, Holloway's ship is transporting an unknown energy source, a green glowing orb. Another big mistake. The four dames are rescued and feign a sob story of violation and mayhem. Kyra (Noelle Perris...the Rhona Mitra look-a-like) heads the stewardess-pirates and soon they rise-up. First they tie up beautiful ship medic Landon (Maija Polsley)...this is unfortunate as this beauty is about to become anything but beautiful.
The four pirates cage the crew and the orb begins infecting babes. Sadie (Paige La Pierre) is eager to carve up the crew...and to have pre-marital sex with them. Uh oh, as the orb pulsates, Nola (Stephanie Skewes), clad in her stewardess outfit and silver boots, is surprised by a crew member and pushed into the orb. Nola will emerge a grotesque zombie, impervious to bullets. She infects some more and when pretty medic Landon is infected, the zombie population increases. Now the crew survivors must unite with Kyra's pirate-stewardesses in order to isolate the zombies (this won't work), and fight off their increasing numbers. The gals have one trick up their sleeves (or inside their go-go boots), Steve Railsback! He plays an android, immune to zombie bites. This might not be enough as Kyra and her diminishing gang never play fair...even when zombies attack.
Yes, you guessed it...there will be a great cat-fight between Kyra and Holloway. Will Kyra and Holloway be able to put their differences aside and work to defeat the space-zombies? Will nympho-psycho Sadie leave anyone alive to have pre-marital sex with? Just what is this orb and why is it on Holloway's ship? There will be some gratuitous gore, gratuitous cat-fights, and fanged zombies oozing black gunky slime out of their mouths. Do you really need anything more in a movie. "Plaguers" is as close to horror/exploitation perfection as you will find. Written and directed by Brad Sykes, "Plaguers" will satisfy you on so many levels.

1 comment:

  1. This is how Buck Rogers should have been, the pulsating stone, is it a trigger for passions, a metaphor, only one thought on mind, not blood, but sex?

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