Wednesday, March 13, 2019

Caltiki, The Immortal Monster, The Blob Eats Mexico

Too bad Mexico took a pass on the two World Wars and Korea. As 1959's "Caltiki, The Immortal Monster" finishes up, we are treated to an impressive show of force from the Mexican army and their endless supplies of flamethrowers. As I've said repeatedly, there has never been a bad film that features a flamethrower...never mind dozens of flamethrowers. To add to the spice, as the flamethrowers are throwing flames, we are also treated to the sultry Didi Sullivan (probably not Mexican) traipse through the final half hour clad only in a semi-see-through white negligee in much peril. I agree, how did you miss this one?
In 607 B.C. (or maybe it was A.D.), the Mayans, for no known reason, abandoned their cities. Why? An archaeological team is on the verge of answering that question when most of them are wiped out by a blob. Incidentally, the f/x guys made this blob out of animal intestines. Nieto (Arturo Dominici) is the only poor sap to make it back to base-camp, but now he is a drooling, mad-lunatic. This unnerves Professor John Fielding (John Merivale) and his wife Ellen (Sullivan). She's beautiful and takes this opportunity to yell at John that "this is no way to spend a honeymoon." She has a point. The opportunistic Max (Gerard Herter) takes this opportunity to try to move in on Ellen...Ellen rejects him like a toddler pushes away broccoli.  Max is married to the beautiful Linda (Daniela Rocca), but she is a half breed and doesn't have the negligee stash that Ellen has.
Okay, back to the monster. As Max and John are attacked by the thing when they return to the cave, John must rescue Max who comes away with part of the blob attached to his arm. Others in the party will be dissolved and consumed by the ever-growing mass. The attached blob is removed from Max and John will keep it in the lab...big mistake. Max will turn psycho in the hospital, kill a pretty nurse, and head to the Fielding estate to have his way with Ellen and her negligee.  The blob? It continues to grow and now the little blob in Fielding's lab also grows and busts out of its fish-tank. Uh oh...a comet heads to Earth and apparently the Mayans prophesied this comet would breed with the blob and destroy the planet. As Ellen puts on her aforementioned nightie, Max and the the two blobs head to her, to either eat her or ravage her.
Will Mexico survive? Will the chaste and loyal Ellen remain unsoiled from the advances of the blob and Max? Will Linda woman up and get herself some fashionable negligees or engage in a cat-fight with Ellen in order to keep her man?  This is a fun one and the battle to save the world, and Mexico City, will be a fiery one. For some great blob made from intestine carnage, and some nice cheesecake, enjoy "Caltiki, The Immortal Monster," directed by Riccardo Freda and an un-credited Mario Bava.

1 comment:

  1. dat's my territory, might need to set up a scene in mexico city, the pyramid of sun and moon and revive the colombians, great review, just adored this one in soooo many ways, could this be a sign i should start writing again?