Monday, May 15, 2023

Land of Doom, Blonde Post-Apocalypse Babe and her Crossbow

She's tall.  Blonde.  Sultry!  She has a crossbow.  Alas, she never learned to fire it.  So she is bait for every mutant and man in a post-apocalyptic world.  Sounds like modern day college campuses, I know.  Today we look at one of those 1980s post-apocalyptic epics filmed overseas (Turkey).  In a plague infested landscape, where psycho motorcycle gangs rule, blonde babes never can rest.  Today we look at 1986's "Land of Doom."

As our film begins, Slater's (Daniel Radell) raiders rape and pillage a peaceful town in a post-apocalyptic landscape. The only surviving woman is blonde, blue-eyed beauty Harmony (Deborah Rennard).  She hides from the slaughter in a cave and there she meets a wounded hunk named Anderson (Garrick Dowhen).  After determining he will not rape her...the only guy in the movie who doesn't try to rape her...she agrees to travel with him.  The two are in search of a land where people are peaceful.  Along the way they will be ambushed and she will endure numerous attempted rapes...from raiders...mutants... cannibals... etc.  Harmony has a crossbow which she has no clue how to use so she resorts to kicking everyone in the nuts.  Anderson is impressed and the two battle raiders together.

Slater is furious his old foe, Anderson, is still loose. Now he wants his main man Purvis (Frank Garret) to capture Anderson and Harmony alive.  He does and the two are now chained to a wall in Slater's cave.  Slater intends to rape Harmony.  Alas...the munchkins show up with a flamethrower...really!  You'll see. Harmony will get more chances to kick more raiders in the nuts...which she does...and she will keep having difficulty figuring a point-and-shoot crossbow. Hey, she's blonde.  Now Harmony and Anderson will have a big war against Slater and his raiders.  The Munchkins loom, but one may wonder if they will try to rape Harmony.

Is post-apocalyptic Turkey a metaphor for American college campuses today?  Will Harmony ever figure out a trigger, or will she be relegated to a post-apocalyptic existence of scrapbooking and quilting?  Will Anderson ever get a clue and plant a wild wet one on Harmony's lips, even if it will mean a kick in the nuts?  "Land of Doom" is ambitious, action heavy, and has a lot of explosions.  For some great beefcake and cheesecake, see "Land of Doom."

No comments:

Post a Comment