Monday, November 14, 2022

The Cheerleader Sleepover Slaughter, Nubile Babes Die Horribly

Gratuitous nudity in the shower.  Gratuitous nudity in a hot tub.  Throats slit.  Babes gutted.  Babes strung up.  More gratuitous nudity in the shower.  Yep...if you like Cate Blanchett or Meryl Streep films...stop reading.  Every now and then we need a film like like 2022's "The Cheerleader Sleepover Slaughter," directed by Christopher Leto.  This will have a high death count, a lot of nudity, more than one babe knifed to death while nude in the shower, and pre-marital sex.  Let us begin.

Lisa (Indica Jane) is the head cheerleader.  Her and her squad have a big game coming up this weekend. After practice, Ali (Vera Marlowe) is the last to change and is in the locker room.  She'll shower, quite gratuitously, and have her throat slashed by a razor killer. Enter the nubile Lori (Taylor Herd)...I admit it, she's my favorite.  She desperately wants on the cheer squad but Lisa hates her for some unknown reason. The murders continue as Summer (Mikayla Kane) gets it in her car by the razor killer. Then we meet some hunks, Bo (Beux Leto) and Joe (Colin O'Neill). Bo is Renee's (Sydney Spaulding) main squeeze and will end up in a hot tub with her. Joe wants to get in Lisa's pants.  You'll see how that works out.

The cheerleaders keep dying horribly.  A sleepover is planned for Ali's house...but she is...well, dead. Lori steps up and invites the babes to her house for the sleepover...they hesitantly accept.  Brandy (Sydni O'Nan), alas, won't make it to the party...the beautiful die so horribly in these films.  Suspects? Lori of course...but is that too easy?  Oh, Lori has a sweet BF, Jason (Jayden Leto)...maybe him?  Or is that too easy?  The dying continues as cheerleaders get strangled, suffocated, gutted, and strung sad.  Whoever this slasher is, he (or she) has something against cheerleaders, to say the least.  There will be heavy drinking, making out, groping in a jacuzzi, and more murder.

What is it about cheerleader squads that we, as movie viewers, secretly cheer on their murderers?  In a Battle Royale Catfight...who would win...Team Cheerleader or Team Sorority Sister?  Kudos and thanks for Christopher Leto who has given us a film which we actually want to see.  Do yourself a favor...have a sleepover, invite scantily clad babes, and put on TubiTV and watch "The Cheerleader Sleepover Slaughter."  

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