Friday, December 29, 2023

Bigfoot, The Big Fury One Finds Love

Joi Lansing...mega-babe!  She was sultry to the max in "The Atomic Submarine" (click on this link to see that review Joi Lansing in Atomic Submarine ).  How about this...a lingerie clad Joi Lansing running through the woods as a naked and aroused Bigfoot chases after her seeking pre-marital sex.  She's practically falling out of her satin intimate as the fury and smelly creature...well, you get the picture.  They just don't make movies like this anymore.  Today we look at 1970's "Bigfoot," directed by Robert E. Slatzer.

Joi (Lansing), a rich and sultry babe, crashes her private plane into the mountainous wilderness.  Immediately she sheds her clothes in favor for a more appropriate piece of shiny lingerie.  Bigfoot picks up on this and abducts her. Who can blame him? A bikini babe Chris (Judith Jordan) and hunk Rick (Christopher Mitchum) break away from their motorcycle gang to have pre-marital sex in the woods.  Along comes Bigfoot...he conks him on the head and abducts the bikini babe Chris.  Who can blame him?  Now Bigfoot and his family have two prisoners...two sultry babes.  The gals figure out that the monsters seek to mate with them.  Who can blame them? Oh yes...Jasper (John Carradine) and his sidekick Elmer (John Mitchum) come to town trying to hock junk and pass bad checks. In short, this duo will team up with Chris' hunk BF Rick and go look for the girls.

Rick wants to kill Bigfoot before it soils Chris.  Jasper wants to capture it and sell it for a circus sideshow. Meanwhile, the lingerie clad Joi and the bikini clad Chris are being drooled over by a family of monsters.  Uh oh...the king of all Bigfoots (James Stellar) is coming down from the top of the mountain to claim Joi as its bride.  One wonders how Chris feels about coming in second to Joi.  You know, it has to be killing her.  Anyway, a humongous Bigfoot is on its way for Joi and Chris is probably itching to scratch Joi's eyes out and pull out her hair.  What a catfight might be brewing!  Jasper and friends form a posse and climb into the mountains to rescue the gals.  We figure the gals want to be rescued...but deep inside their psyches, one wonders if there is something about the Bigfoots that appeals to them.  Just saying.

Is Joi in more danger from the humongous Bigfoot, or from the jealous bikini babe left for the normal sized Bigfoots?   With the lack of real men left in America, do Joi and Chris really want to be rescued by the creepy Jasper and Elmer?  What do the huge and humongous Bigfoots have that Joi and Chris may be attracted to?  This is a good one and will showcase Joi Lansing perfectly.  For a very erotically themed Bigfoot film, see "Bigfoot."   

1 comment:

  1. that was a doozy and a woozy, boy, big foot knows what women really want, to swept off their feet...