Monday, October 2, 2023

Van Helsing, Monster Hunter Saves the Universe

No!  Not the one with Kate Beckinsale.  Every time I do a movie called "Van Helsing," you guys seem to want the Kate Beckinsale one.  Where is she anyway?  Anybody know?  Seems to have dropped off the face of the Earth. Anyway, this is the BC Fourteen "Van Helsing."  Kate won't be in this one...but if you're real just might see Bigfoot.  Today we look at this ultra-modern work of animation...2023's "Van Helsing." 

As our film begins Jack Van Helsing (Ernesto Galan) is still on Earth.  The apocalypse has occurred.  Nuclear and biological weapons have murdered the planet.  Jack and a few survivors must scavenge for food.  Alas, mutants, zombies, and monsters kill most of the survivors and Jack escapes in a rocket ship and heads to the moon.  There he grows plants for a colony of fellow human survivors lead by Lilith (Jennifer Fourteen).  The two obviously have sexual tension between them.  Then horror, Xterminator (Edson Camacho), a terminator like AI monster, attacks and wipes out everyone. The sultry Lilith is taken prisoner and Jack is the only one who escapes. 

With Jack on the run and Lilith the prisoner of a psycho machine, Xterminator plans a final sweep to rid the universe of all human survivors.  Also adopting this quest is a cast-off earthling, Thanatos (Bob Reiff). This ghoulish figure is now King of the Zombies with a horde of the undead at his service.  Now Xterminator, Thanatos, and another god-like threat, Anubis (also Bob Reiff) are threatened by one another as to who will actually assume lordship over the entire universe.  Jack will not only scavenge for food and fuel, but also for allies.  He needs to do what his grandfather did...slay the monsters in order to save mankind.  

Can Van Helsing save the beautiful Lilith from the clutches of the machines?  Can Earth make a rebound and grow out of the burning embers of their ruins?  Given this is a BC Fourteen film, can we expect Bigfoot to trample in and save the day?  The images of a post-apocalyptic Earth are haunting and should be seen as a warning to where we all may be headed.  For something a little (okay, a lot) different, with a lot of monsters...see "Van Helsing."   

No comments:

Post a Comment