Wednesday, July 6, 2016

Bigfoot vs. Zombies, The War that had to be Faught

Once each generation a film comes along which demanded to be made.  2016's "Bigfoot vs. Zombies" (directed by Mark Polonia) is one such film.  No doubt a metaphor for so much that ails human civilization today, BvZ has something for all of us.  As evidenced by the cheesy gorilla suit sufficing as the bigfoot costume, BvZ is low-budget and campy, but aren't we all.
The Wyoming County Body Farm is about to have a zombie outbreak.  The cause? Dr. Peele (Jeff Kirkendall) has created a potion that is supposed to help the corpses decompose.  Of course, Peele's creation has a side-effect...it re-animates the dead.  Uh oh....this body farm is situated in the middle of bigfoot's hunting ground.  The bodies rise from the ground and a pretty nature photographer (Greta Volkova) will be the first eaten. Quickly the zombies all rise and start eating body farm staff.  Amidst the initial survivors are the ever amorous Renee (Danielle Donohue) and dweeb delivery guy Ed (Dave Fife).  As the carnage begins, these two engage in pre-marital sex as their co-workers are either eaten or turned into walkers.
Our survivors seem to have run out of hope...but wait!  Duke (Ken Van Sant), a big game hunter joins them.  Unfortunately, while picking off the un-dead, Duke runs out of ammo.  Will luck never cease: bigfoot (Steve Diasparra) develops a crush on the ever amorous Renee. Bigfoot then fights with all he has to protect the promiscuous lab clerk and her survivor buddies. This won't be an easy endeavor for our enigmatic ape-thing as the persistent un-dead keep coming.
Will bigfoot deliver his new love from this ominous danger?  How about the other survivors who aren't as pretty as the frisky Renee?  Bigfoot is an obvious metaphor for the regular schmucks who make this world work (...maybe not), and the zombies are a metaphor for the establishment elites who exploit the good peeps (...this is a stretch, actually).  In any case, "Bigfoot vs. Zombies" is clearly the most important film of this millennium (....well, more important than "Jupiter Ascending," anyway).

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