Sunday, February 26, 2023

Star Odyssey, The Italians Do Star Wars

Rip-offs from Italy! They do it well.  Euro-babes and Euro-hunks abound.  There will be sexy costumes and a lot of grunting.  So when an over-rated "Star Wars" hit the screens, the Italians were tasked.  Hence 1979's "Star Odyssey," directed by Alfonso Brescia.  It'll feature a pair of lovelorn and suicidal robots, a sultry chemist in a stretch vinyl leotard and hooker boots, grunting men, light sabers, androids that die nicely, a psychic battle between two old geezers, and a romance between a Euro-babe and an inter-galactic gambler.  George Lucas, eat your heart out!

An evil reptilian warlord brings his fleet of spaceships to Earth.  His goal is conquest.  After destroying Earth's military bases he captures Africans for slaves.  Space Control on Earth is powerless and enlist the help of mental genius Professor Mauri (Ennio Balbo).  Mauri has psychic and hypnotic powers...and a babe niece Irene (Yanti Somer).  Mauri puts his old team together, but this isn't easy.  He gets sexpot Bridget (Malisa Longo) and her beau Shawn (Chris Avram) out of a moon prison.  The two are chemists and will try to come up with an answer for the alien energy source.  Also brought in is Irene's former lover, the gambler, Dirk (Gianni Garko).  Oh yes, professional wrestler, Norman (Roberto Dell'Acqua) is also brought in.  Norman brings two robots with him.  The two robots are lovers and suicidal and bicker nonstop.  

The team is ready to plan a defense and an attack on the reptile guy's space forces.  Reptile guy lands his ship on the defenseless Earth and sends his android army to attack Mauri's compound.  A raging battle ensues and Irene is captured.  Mauri and his troops go after Irene and the battle of the millennium occurs.  The two robots bicker some more and things explode.  Reptile man and Mauri engage in a battle of psychic powers and give one another headaches.  Bridget keeps looking great in her vinyl and hooker boot outfit, as Dirk schemes to get Irene back.  Space battles will occur with a lot of spaceships and things will explode in space.  

Will Mauri's team overcome the evil reptile man and his android army?  Will Irene and Dirk rekindle their love affair...and will anyone have pre-marital sex with Bridget?  What of the suicidal robots...will they short circuit each other or find a way to engage?  This is a good one and a lot of fun.  For a "Star Wars" type movie with better looking characters than the Lucas film, see "Star Odyssey." 

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