Friday, April 22, 2022

The 13th Cross, God's Wrath Delivered by Trailer Trash

God's wrath can come from anywhere...even a trailer park.  When trailer trash is armed with the armor of God...well...Bill Clinton better beware.  We've all met them...lunatics who feel they're equipped and guided by God himself.  Unlike the peeps in today's film, hopefully we will have enough wisdom to run away.  Today we look at a bloody one, 2020's "The 13th Cross," directed by Joseph DeGolyer.

Moses (Eric Wood) is a hulk of a guy living in a trailer park.  He used to be a really bad man who is about to be redeemed.  He's visited by what he thinks is an angel, Tamara (Melanie Browning).  Tamara gives Moses a job...murder 13 individuals.  These people have raped, kidnapped, or murdered children and escaped full justice.  Moses sets out on his new trek...and does a fine job.  In the midst of his crusade, Renee (Chelsea Jurkiewicz) flees to his trailer.  She is fleeing a boyfriend, Adam ( Tyler Dane), who pummels her mercilessly.  Moses agrees to take her in and protect her.  Now the 15 year old skank is shacking up with our Jesus freak.  She tries to seduce him...and he tries to resist.

Moses leaves his trailer and stalks his next victims.  One by one he gets closer to killing all 13.  Uh oh...the temptation of a pre-nubile female in his trailer is getting to be too much.  Now Moses must not only worry about being fully redeemed, but now must worry about giving into temptation.  Each murder lessens his resolve to stay pure.  Adam, the boyfriend, gets more desperate and plans a raid on Moses' trailer.  Renee believes she has fallen in love with our avenging angel and turns up her efforts to corrupt him.  Each new killing gets messier as it is apparent that Moses is losing his assassin-touch.

Will Moses finish his charge and murder all 13 perverts before being soiled by the young Renee?  Just who is this Tamara babe and why has she offered Moses redemption through murder?  Is salvation just a bad day at a trailer park away?  Chelsea Jurkiewicz and Eric Wood are amazing, and fear not, in real life she is a  lot older than 15.  For a redemptive good time, see "The 13th Cross," and down a few Old Milwaukees as you do.    

2 comments:

  1. Hey! I made that movie! Thanks for the review, we've all enjoyed it haha.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks for the great review. Glad you could see what the filmmakers were trying to do.

    ReplyDelete