Wednesday, April 12, 2017

Fire Maidens of Outer Space, Dancing Spacebabes

La la la...Take my la la..I'm a stranger in la la!  Yep, You'll be humming that for days after you see 1956's "Fire Maidens of Outer Space."  To give the lovely spacebabes credit, they do perform a very erotic dance number to that fact, several dance numbers that would seduce the most hardened spaceman. For gritty realism and thought provoking scifi, let us look at "Fire Maidens of Outer Space."
In the spirit of world peace and harmony a space expedition is put together to Jupiter's 13th moon. That moon is believed to have the same atmosphere as Earth.  We see the prep for the mission which consists of a very gratuitous secretary shot (including a peek up her skirt) and some neat product placement advertisement for Longines watches, and Coke. Forget about the buxom secretary, for our five-man crew led by Captain Larson (Paul Carpenter) and Blair (Anthony Dexter) are about to discover something even more nubile and seductive.  The ship is contacted before landing by a mysterious voice and guided to a landing zone.
Once on the 13th moon, our crew is beset by a lame, and ineffective creature. They rescue the very shapely fire maiden, Hestia (Susan Shaw) from the dweeby terror.  She brings Larson and Blair to a castle compound inhabited by the survivors of the lost continent of Atlantis.  The survivors consist of dozens of sultry spacebabes (fire maidens), all waiting for men to mate with.  Space travel can be tough, I know. Uh oh, Hestia is promised to Blair, who saved her life, making Duessa (Jacqueline Curtis) jealous. Duessa then plots Hestia's fiery demise.  As the creature breeches the compound walls, and Hestia is grabbed and put in mortal danger, Blair and Larson must act to save the nubile damsels.
Will our spacebabes put jealousy aside and help our crew fight the evil, if not lame creature?  Will all the crew members find mates in the ranks of the fire maidens?  Will the existence of the fire maidens push back gender relations, here on Earth, decades?  Okay, the creature is very lame, but the fire maidens, and their seductive dance routines are what make this film.  For pure B movie fun, ripped right out of today's headlines (...okay, maybe not), see "Fire Maidens of Outer Space," directed by Cy Roth.


  1. Dear Lord, Christopher! This sounds craptacular in a good way. Those damsels in distress sound cheesy but hysterical. I would like to see this for the sheer fun of it. Good review!

  2. Sounds like cheese of epic proportions. At first I thought "lame" beast as in it had hurt its foot 😂

  3. I had the MST3K version of this movie at one time. I think I need to see the full version now.

  4. Wow, this sounds pretty fun! I've gotta check it out ^_^