Wednesday, August 2, 2017

Blood Song, Beach Blanket Slasher

Kane Hodder? Wimp! Robert Englund? Yawn! How about Gunnar Hansen?  Oh please!  Those guys just don't do it. For a real slasher, someone who's very name invokes fear into the minds of beautiful and nubile damsels, who better than...Frankie Avalon? Yes, that's right...Frankie Avalon!  We all remember when he chopped up Annette Funicello into five bloody pieces.  Now, the nubile damsel, you ask? Donna Wilkes!  You remember the lovely Donna Wilkes from "Jaws 2." She was the very cute teen with the quivering lip, the only one we didn't want the shark to eat.
Frankie Avalon
The criminally insane Foley (Avalon) murders an orderly and escapes from the nut house.  The perky Marion (Wilkes), a high school student, is recovering from a bad leg injury which has her saddled with a large leg brace. Foley is drawn to seek out Marion, who has nightmares in which she psychically witnesses all of Foley's kills. Because of her dreams, Marion knows Foley is heading her way, but no one believes her.  On his way to Marion's town, Foley meets a a nice young man and a very beautiful hitchhiker...he slaughters them both.
Donna Wilkes
As Foley reaches town, Marion pleads with her boyfriend, to believe her. He doesn't, but she likes to make out with him so he tolerates her rantings. Our insaniac will use an ax, his hands, and a hatchet to murder his way to the perky Marion who is in no condition to run away.  With her lower lip quivering, just like in "Jaws 2," Donna Wilkes will be pursued an cornered by Frankie Avalon. Steadying her lower lip, Donna Wilkes will find fight deep inside her belly that she never knew she had and for the first time, Frankie Avalon will have to work for this kill.
An unfortunate hitchhiker
What is the link between Marion and Foley which draws him to her? Will our damsel and insaniac breakout in song and swimsuits? Did all the time Frankie Avalon spent with Annette Funicello drive him to murderous rage?  The kills are quite gory and when the end credits roll you will have seen a very dark slasher film.  Directed by Alan J. Levi, "Blood Song" is a surprisingly horrific thriller given the cast.

2 comments:

  1. Sweet Jesus, Christopher! I need to see this. Really. Frankie Avalon is the least likely person to be a killer. This should be a treat. Great review and particularly humorous.

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  2. Very nice review Christopher, caught this a few years back & found it quite enjoyable stuff & worth seeing just for Frankie Avalon as a psycho killer alone, lol.

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