Sunday, January 14, 2024

Space Wars: Quest for the Deepstar, Monsters, Space-Babes, and Space Hunks, Oh My!

Two sultry space-babes!  First a b***h-slap episode...then an all out catfight!  Oh yes!  Monsters!  Big monsters!  Then bigger monsters eat the big monsters!  This is just too good!  Then spaceships shooting lasers at each other!  More monsters!  More space-babes!  Feisty babes fighting grunting hunks! Do you really need to hear anything else?  Okay, Michael Pare!  Here is the clincher...one of this blog's favorite actresses, Sarah French as the space-babe with an attitude!  Did I mention the monsters?  I know what you're thinking...with catfighting space-babes...will there be tentacles?  Today we look at 2022's "Space Wars: Quest for the Deepstar," directed by Garo Setien.  If you are a fan of Max Gunssler novels, you will love this one. 

A ferocious dragon explodes out of the sand and eats a poor schmuck...and almost eats Kip (Pare). So begins this film. Fortunately, sultry space-babe Taylor (French), Kips's daughter, saves him and the duo go on their perilous quest. The duo are a salvage team running from a sadistic warlord, but still quite thew babe, Elnora (Sadie Kurtz). I guess Kip killed all her children and she hasn't got over it. Taylor and Kip decide to go for it all and seek Deepstar. Deepstar?  A wrecked ship with the equipment on board to bring Kip's wife (Elise Muller) back to life. That simple? No way!  Also in search for this thing is Dykstra (Olivier Gruner)...evil hunk.  With him is maybe evil/maybe good hunk Wade (Tyler Gallant) and evil and uber sultry space-babe Nina (Rachelle Brooke-Smith).  Dykstra murders everyone he meets and as you might expect, will come in contact with Kip and Taylor.

Am I leaving anything out?  Of course.  You'll see.  Now, in a barrage that will make "Battlestar Galactica" look like "My Dinner with Andre," spaceship laser fights will be thrown at us in a veritable waterfall.  Yes, Kip and Nina will engage in b***h slapping and a great catfight...or two. Wade and Taylor may fall in love...you'll see. Oh, Taylor?  She throws more punches in this one than Roddy Piper threw in "They Live."  Then more monsters!  Tentacles?  There are of course space-babes...the best bait for tentacles.  You'll see.  For you dames out there...grunting and fighting...and shirtless space-hunk action.  Betrayal and psychotic tendencies will further endanger Taylor.  Then...more monsters!  This may be the best space-babe/space-hunk/monster epic of the 21st century.  John Ford would be pleased with this far reaching plot that could very well be a futuristic John Wayne-type oater.

Will Kip and Taylor find the Deepstar and bring back Kip's wife?  Will Nina and Taylor catfight their way into the tentacles of a slimy monster?  Will hunk Wade prove to be a suitable lover to the sultry Taylor...or a veritable Norman Bates?  This is a good one...don't miss it.  There will be no slow or reflective scenes in this film...total action and gratuitous monster and space-babe action.  See "Space Wars: Quest for the Deepstar" today...it may be the most action packed movie you see in 2024.

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