Friday, October 28, 2016

Sorority Slaughterhouse, Evil Clown shreds Coeds

The evil clown scare that has spread through North America and Europe continues to gather steam.  Our fears of these clowns are largely stirred by our over-active imaginations.  Even FBI offices have been compelled to give statements on this mysterious menace.  David DeCoteau, who has brought us a few Puppetmaster films, has crafted a tale of a 12 inch, perverted clown who goes through coeds like crap through a goose.  Today we look at his film, 2016's "Sorority Slaughterhouse."
Whitman (Eric Roberts), a dean of a college, has just been dumped by a sorority sister.  He then blows his own brains out, but his soul jumps into a 12 inch toy clown, crafted by a voodoo priestess (...don't ask).  Dean Whitman, now Bobo the clown, then descends on Delta Pi Sorority for bloody revenge.  Whitman was a pervert, but as a mini clown, his ability to see naked coeds is maximized.  Uh oh, whenever aroused, Bobo turns into a killing machine.  Every coed in this sorority is stunning, and all engage in activities that arouse Bobo, such as making out with hunks, skinny dipping, pre-marital sex, sensual scented baths, and masturbating.
Our coeds are at a huge disadvantage.  Allie (Jessica Morris) is busy with her occult interests.  Fawn (Jean Louise O'Sullivan) is pursuing hunk Marcus (Anthony Caravella).  Nina (Alexia Quinn) is writing a porn/romance novel.  Victoria (Kelli Seymour) is busy being a B@#&H.  Kitty (Brianna Joy Chomer), who is first to go, likes scented baths. The mini-perve then wanders around finding whichever coed is doing something sexually alluring.  Drano, balloons, a vibrator (...actually Bobo himself acts as a very deadly vibrator), knives and ropes all assist our monster in offing the coeds and their hunks.
Which sorority sister had an affair with Whitman?  Will at least the clean cut sister, who refrains from sexual immorality, survive?  Wait, none of them do much refraining.  Is the twelve inch clown a metaphor for something much larger...say the misogynistic flavor of many of our top universities?  Okay, maybe not.  Either way, as Halloween and a massive onslaught of evil clowns approach, "Sorority Slaughterhouse" is the perfect film to watch.  The DVD is reasonably priced, and the cast is great looking, even as corpses.