Return to House on Haunted Hill, Back into the Haunted House

Baphemut!  Who, or what is it?  Who care's!? Cerina Vincent and her great big...smile is in this film!  We have not done a Cerina Vincent film in a while.  Also in it is the lovely and dangerous Calita Rainford, who plays a hot Asian henchwoman clad in leather wielding a lot of weapons.  Sadly, Ms. Rainford will have her face cut off by Jeffrey Combs and cease being beautiful early in this film...happens. Today we look at a sequel to 1999's "House on Haunted Hill," 2007's "Return to House on Haunted Hill," directed by Victor Garcia.

Ariel (Amanda Righetti) is sad. Her sister, who survived the original film, has died by apparent suicide. The sultry magazine executive will be forced to go back to the insane asylum/house on Haunted Hill by thug Desmond (Erik Palladino) and his henchmen and henchwoman Harue (Rainford). Sadly, the babe Asian will be offed soon by ghost mad scientist Vannacut (Combs). Also along is Professor Hammer (Steven Pacey), Paul (Tom Riley), Ariel's hunk beau, and Michelle (Vincent) who serves no purpose other than wearing a tight top displaying nice cleavage. Desmond wants the Baphemut statue because a buyer will pay him millions for it.  Hammer wants it too, for academic purposes, of course.  The ghosts begin appearing and when they do...you're dead.  Henchmen will be pulled apart, the babe henchwoman will be sliced up and lose her face during hot lesbian sex with sultry and nude female ghosts (what a scene this is!), etc.

Ariel realizes she needs to get out of the house with her beau, Paul.  Uh oh...Ariel is given visions by some ghosts that indicate she needs to stay in the house, find Baphemut, and destroy it. Desmond proves just as threatening as the ghosts of this insane asylum and the mad doctor.  Michelle?  Vannacut finds her and...well, sometimes impressive cleavage is not enough to ward off evil spirits...go figure. Now the dead return to life, ghosts appear, and Vannacut is dead set against allowing Baphemut to be destroyed.  Ariel, however, just may be too pretty to die...though we also said this about Harue and Michelle.

Will Ariel be able to destroy Baphemut and get her and Paul out of the evil house?  Will Desmond's greed prevent all of this?  Will Vannacut cut any parts of Ariel off and dump them in a pile that also contains Harue's face?  Bet you never thought you'd hear that question today when you slid out of bed.  This is a good one with great cheese and gore.  For some terrific haunted insane asylum drama with hot chicks, see "Return to House on Haunted Hill."