Bell From Hell, An Insaniac's Revenge

Weird, twisted and creepy! Just the way we like it. Add perverted and unsettling and we have a gem from Spain, 1973's "Bell From Hell" (aka "The Bells"). A standard revenge plot, perhaps, but this one is moved along with strange scene after strange scene. We realize that we are in for a unsettling experience when John (Renaud Verley) explains why he is leaving his job at the slaughterhouse, "I've learned everything I need to know." For what? Oh come on, you can guess.

John is released from the psychiatric hospital on a sort of probation (...this always works out well). Was he really insane, or did his Aunt Marta (Viveca Lindfors) merely want to steal his inheritance? The point is John feels the need for revenge and after getting practice at the slaughterhouse, he heads back to see Aunt Marta and his three lovely cousins, Esther (Maribel Martin), Teresa (Nuria Gemeno), and Maria (Christina von Blanc). He also amasses quite a collection of invasive surgical tools for future use. John has a plan, and his experience at the slaughterhouse and the surgical tools are integral parts of it. The three cousins are no pure flowers, as each of them, including underage Esther, desires taboo sex with him. I will skip the gang rape and the man at the urinal scene, but those scenes drive home this film's effort to make us feel uncomfortable.

The time to enact the plan has come and rape, humiliation, and bees will kick it off...a lot of bees, I should say. Uh oh for John...his Aunt Marta isn't as helpless as her advanced age and wheelchair may suggest. As the three nubile lasses are readied for a most violent and gruesome fate, Aunt Marta's plan is also put into action. Let me not forget to mention the bell. A new bell is being delivered to the town's church and this thing will figure prominent in the end of the film. In fact, director Claudio Guerin, while filming the last scene of this film, was killed when he fell off the church's bell tower...really, I'm not making this up. No spoilers here, but Mr. Guerin's demise was a lot less painful than what John has planned for his aunt and three cousins, or what Aunt Marta has planned for him.

Who will win, or will there be no survivors? Is John insane or are his plans for bloody revenge completely justified?  This one will have you squirming especially when you realize the slaughterhouse scenes will be replayed with the three nubile lasses. For weird Euro-horror, enjoy "Bell From Hell" from Spain.

Fractured, Young Lovers in Distress

It can be difficult to watch. We meet a very pretty young lady and a handsome young man in a horror film. As much as we like them and want them to live happily ever after, we remember this is a horror film and there is still 70 minutes left until the end credits. What could go wrong? Everything! Beset by a horrific force, we cringe as these great looking lovers encounter much peril. Or...have our eyes deceived us? Yep, this is one you will want to pay close attention to.

The aforementioned couple, Rebecca (April Pearson) and Michael (Karl Davies). As they drive on a dark night we get to know them pretty good. Passionate and intense we can see this duo engage in pre-marital sex or antagonize each other into a lover's spat. This night...passionate sex awaits them as they reach this vacation estate in the country. Both are a bit on edge as the evening has contained some slightly weird and unsettling episodes. But wait! They may not be alone. As the sex goes from sweet to slightly more deviant, something or someone in the house may be stalking them.

Despite a flurry of romance and pre-marital sex, both Michael and Rebecca are spooked. Now on edge, more indications suggest something ominous is in the house. A noise here, a noise there, a bloody hand print over there.... Then all hell breaks loose...and that's all for the plot. What happens to Rebecca and Michael is nothing as compared to what will happen to you. Jamie Patterson takes us on a ride which will be rocky and shocking. He'll teach you to be wary of trusting what you see. Not all is as it seems, and yes, it can always get worse. 

Will Rebecca and Michael survive the night and unknown torment? What is in the house and is it hunting them? Wait...how about Alva (Louisa Lytton) and Freyr (Jordan Metcalfe)...why hasn't this review mentioned those two characters? This is a fun and shocking horror story that may also be a twisted love story. For a horrific ordeal with great acting that will take you on quite a journey, enjoy Jamie Patterson's "Fractured." To view the trailer of this film, click on the below link.
Fractured trailer

The Night Walker, Barbara Stanwyck- Dream Warrior

The sultry babe has something to say to you. You had it coming. Convinced your lovely wife is having an affair you demand to know who the other guy is. She cuts you to pieces by answering your question, "My lover is only a dream but he's still more of a lover than you!" Ouch! In 1964's "The Night Walker," Barbara Stanwyck's dream may indeed be more real than is good for her. Oh yes, this film was produced and directed by...William Castle!

He's old, grouchy and blind...hardly a good husband. Howard (Hayden Rorke) enjoys tormenting his wife, Irene (Stanwyck). He is convinced she has a lover as she talks in her sleep. In these dreams she is loving some handsome young guy...tall, handsome, and sensitive to her needs. Howard wants to know who it is. He suspects his lawyer, Barry (Robert Taylor). He's handsome and tall. He denies it. Then Boom! A very mysterious laboratory accident blows up Howard...or does it? The body is never found. Did Irene kill him? Barry thinks so. Does she have a lover (hence a motive)?

Irene's dreams continue...first nightmares of Howard returning. Then...her lover (Lloyd Bochner) returns in the dreams. At first he wines and dines her and she doesn't want to wake. Then the lover gets a bit menacing and the sweet dreams become nightmares.  Irene is convinced her dream lover is real and the places he took her to are also real. She asks Barry to help her find out the truth. What follows are ominous nightmares...murder...and maybe a grotesquely burnt Howard.

Is Irene an innocent victim of bad dreams or a conspiracy to drive her mad? Is Howard still alive? Is her dream lover a real person or some nocturnal threat bent on her destruction? This one will keep you guessing and a few more characters will be introduced to increase the mystery. As it becomes apparent that a murderer is involved, we really pull for Irene even though we are not sure of her virtue. For a fast paced mystery in which Barbara Stanwyck demonstrates some great screaming, enjoy "The Night Walker."

The Hideous Sun Demon, Radioactive Scientist Runs Amok

This film from 1958 had such an affect on the ethos of the American southwest that Arizona State University picked it as their mascot for their athletic teams. Ah...1958...we were all still worried about the affects of radiation. Today we peek into our microwave ovens as our TV dinners are cooking. Back then however, insects were growing to the size of school buses and human beings would regress into monsters every time a nuclear test occurred in the Nevada desert . Hence "The Hideous Sun Demon."

With OSHA nowhere to be found Dr. Gilbert McKenna (Robert Clarke, who also directed) drops some radioactive isotopes in his laboratory. As he is rushed to the hospital the doctors and nurses are confused by what they see. Even though Gilbert was exposed to radiation, his skin hasn't melted and he hasn't sprouted tentacles. Seemingly unaffected, a pretty nurse brings Gilbert to the roof for some fresh air...bad idea! In just a few seconds, Gilbert becomes a reptile-man scaring all the patients and nurses as he runs horrified through the hospital. The lizard-man turns back to Gilbert as he comes back inside. With bad insurance, Gilbert is kicked out of the hospital and he finds refuge at a mountain getaway with instructions to stay out of the sun. Can't beat 1950s medical care.

Men will be men...and Gilbert's ability to follow simple instructions must've burned up in the lab accident. Next stop...a run-down bar where Trudy, a buxom blonde lounge singer, in performing. He falls immediately in love with her and takes her to the beach where they have pre-marital sex and watch the sun come up. Yep...lizard-man returns as Trudy sleeps. She is spared, but he runs out on her causing havoc through the countryside. As the nubile lab assistant Ann (Patricia Manning) seeks to get Gilbert help, the problematic radiation-scientist finds his way back to the seedy bar where he will incur the wrath of a hoodlum with a gun and win Trudy back. The buxom Trudy will be run out on again after the lizard-man kills the hoodlum and flees into the oilfields where some sweet Californians will get in his way.

Will Ann be able to help the clumsy scientist or will she end up in a passionate cat-fight with the buxom lounge singer? Will the lizard-man mangle either of these nubile women? Is Gilbert's metamorphosis into a lizard-man Robert Clarke's ominous statement about the duality of man in a nuclear age gone wild? This is a fun one from the days we all feared nuclear annihilation. We have come a long way...with deadlier nukes and so much more of them, we no longer fear nuclear war. Nope...today we are smarter as a collective people and realize throwing plastic bottles away in the trash is much deadlier than radioactive weapons.

Death Smiles on a Murderer, The Dead Return and She is Mad

We've all done it. Locked in our secret basement laboratories, we have all attempted to create a serum to bring the dead back to life. Many of us have succeeded in bringing certain roadkill back. A mashed squirrel, crushed rat, or a fallen pigeon perhaps. To bring a dead person back to life is a bit more complicated. For example, how do we decide who to bring back? Billions have died throughout world history. In 1973's Italian horror film "Death Smiles on a Murderer" a beautiful woman is brought back. Directed by Joe D'Amato, this film can serve as a warning to all of us amateur mad-scientists that often times the more beautiful among us is often the deadliest.

When we first meet the sultry Greta (Ewa Aulin), she is a corpse. Her loving (a very inappropriate love, I might add) brother Franz (Luciano Rossi) has studied the black arts and has resurrected her. Jump forward a few years. Greta mysteriously shows up at the estate of Walter (Sergio Doria) and Eva (Angela Bo). Greta apparently has amnesia and her coachman is torn to shreds as the stage crashes on their property. Dr. Sturges (Klaus Kinski) restores her to health but notices something strange about Greta's condition. As Sturges returns to his secret lab with some secrets he gleaned from Greta, he then brings a corpse back to life. This experiment's success will have a short-lived success, as...well...you'll see.

Back to the estate. As Greta regains her strength, both Walter and his wife Eva fall in love with her. Eva will invade Greta's bath and have sex with her, and Walter will have sex with her in the stable. Uh oh, Eva becomes jealous and plots Greta's demise. Thinking she has killed Greta, the mysterious beauty returns and the results will be quite bloody. As Greta goes through Italian nobility like crap through a goose, whatever erotic moments Walter and Eva shared with her may come back to haunt them in blood red fashion.

What is the reason for Greta's homicidal mission to Walter and Eva's estate? Where is Greta's brother, Franz? Has she killed him too, or is she seeking to re-unite with her brother/lover? Just what did happen to Dr. Sturges in his secret laboratory? Erotic and gory, this horror story is full of surprises, so pay attention through the last frame. Ewa Aulin is captivating as the ravishing seductress turned monster. For some arousing Giallo, enjoy "Death Smiles on a Murderer."

Escape From Coral Cove, Asian Swimsuit Models vs. Monster

We have a bloody sea-monster film today from Hong Kong. Actually, 1986's "Escape From Coral Cove" serves as a swimsuit calendar photo-shoot and horror film. Gratuitous to the max with Asian swimsuit models in the surf, jumping around playing volleyball, diving, sailing, cat-fighting, and frolicking in the surf...and being shredded by a weird monster. When not seeking pre-marital sex, our damsels are beset upon by a fiend bent on their destruction.

Okay, a plot...if you must! Hunk Alex (Alex Feng) is driving his red convertible with his GF Chen-Chen (Yin Cheung Joh). Chen-Chen will don a tight, black and leopard-skin swimsuit throughout most of this film. On cue, a helicopter delivers Chen-Chen's sister San-San (Else Chan) and her friend Irene (Yeun-Ching Leung). Alex also seeks pre-marital sex with these two which will really tick-off Chen-Chen. Oh yes, San-San will don a tight, revealing red swimsuit and Irene a white Donald Duck swimsuit. All three ladies will do a lot of frolicking in the surf and San-San and Chen-Chen will go at it as they fight for Alex' affections. Irene isn't interested in Alex, and this will bother the horny two-timer, but Irene has her sights on a mad-scientist wannabe, Dak (Louis Kong).

Back to substantive parts of the plot...our group sails to a beach arousing the attention of a humanoid, underwater monster. It will follow our crew and then set its sights on the gals...not all of them will fare well.  As the gals battle each other, frolic some more in the surf, fight over Alex, and jump around on the sandy beach, the monster moves in. Gratuitous camera shots highlight all of this capturing the gals all wet, rolling around in the sand, and then jumping up and down a lot. Eventually the camera will be able to focus on severed body parts of these women, and their spurting blood.

Will either Irene, Chen-Chen, or San-San survive the wrath of this creature? Will Alex complete his quest to have pre-marital sex with all three of these gals? Does the creature have any other desires with these women other than clawing them to pieces...think Roger Corman films? Gratuitous swimsuit model scenes make "Escape From Coral Cove" a worthwhile take, and oh by the way...its a monster film. Perhaps Roger Corman would have added additional humiliation for our three damsels, but the three women in this film beat any of the 1980s Sports Illustrated swimsuit models. Directed by Terence Chang, "Escape From Coral Cove" is a guilty pleasure you will enjoy...and never talk about if you desire those around you to think you have any semblance of sophistication.

Endgame- Bronx Lotta Finale, Emanuelle in an Apocalyptic Wasteland

Okay, you are in a bar slugging down a Stella. Life doesn't get any better. Then life does get better. Emanuelle from all those 'Emanuelle' movies walks in and sits next to you. She gives you a look of wanting desire. Uh oh...here's the catch...she can read all your thoughts. Does she give you a spare key to her hotel room? Does she plant a passionate kiss on you? Or does she slap you and reach for her stun-gun? A lot to think about, I know, but in this Italian apocalyptic wasteland film, directed by Joe D'Amato, we will see how a telepathic Emanuelle might behave. Today's feature, "Endgame- Bronx Lotta Finale," starring everyone's favorite Emanuelle, the Indonesian beauty herself, Laura Gemser.

Okay, so she doesn't play the role of Emanuelle in this film, Ms. Gemser's exotic allure is still the highlight of this film. In 2025 most of the Earth has been turned into a radioactive wasteland. A Nazi like government controls a major city. To keep the citizens in line a game-show pits schmucks against a team of hunters tasked to kill them. Ron Shannon (Al Cliver) is reigning champion of this show and he is about to be set loose so the hunt can commence. Oh yes...the mutants. The government wants them exterminated. Lilith (Gemser) is the beautiful leader of a ragtag band of telepathic mutants. They are the next phase of human evolution and they can read minds...which the tyrannical government (and fraternity boys everywhere) fears.

While eluding hunters, Shannon is approached by Lilith. She offers to pay him millions if he will lead the surviving telepathic mutants to safety outside the city. He accepts. Shannon is now on the run with Lilith and her peeps, but the military, the hunters, and a host of evil mutants are in pursuit. Oh yes, the evil mutants...the resemble fish-men, lizard-men, and ape-men. They are regressing as a species and want to tear apart the telepathic ones. Actually, they have more humiliating and carnal plans for Lilith. With machine-guns, grenades, motorcycles, and knives, World War 4 is fought just outside city limits as Shannon seeks to protect and deliver the telepathic ones and also protect the chastity of Emanuelle...I mean Lilith.

Will the next phase of human evolution survive and deliver us all from a the ruling tyrannical government? Will Emanuelle...I mean Lilith, be spared rape an humiliation by the disgusting fish-man mutant? Will Ron Shannon and Lilith hook up and live happily ever after or will she read his man-like thoughts? This is a standard Italian post-apocalypse film but the ravishing Laura Gemser makes it a worthwhile take. Fun at times, and sadly brutal at others, enjoy "Endgame- Bronx Lotta Finale,"