Sunday, May 26, 2019

Axegrinder, Run Laura Run!

Laura? Good question...not our favorite Emanuelle, Laura Gemser. might be. Confused? You'll have to see 2006's "Axegrinder" (aka "2 Young 2 Die") in its entirety to find out the answer to that mystery. Our Laura in this film is played by Cassie Daniels. 50% (only a slight exaggeration) of "Axegrinder" is dedicated to shots of Cassie Daniels, clad in a tight green halter top, jiggling very erotically as she runs for her life through the woods. She would have done well on "Baywatch."
There is a backstory to explain our axe wielding maniac, Freddy Palmer (Jed Rowen). We'll skip it here and go right to a group of three hunks and three babes heading into the woods for camping, alcohol abuse, and wild pre-marital sex. Just before their arrival, two hot lesbians (Gina Valona and April Betts) are axed to pieces while having wild sex. Also in this camping party is the slut Shelley (Berna Roberts), the deviant sex addict Donna (Jennider Peo), the nerd James (Chris Todd), Laura's BF Bobby (Freddy Morales), and Mike (J.P. Edwards)...I forget who's BF he is. Then our axe-wielding maniac arrives and begins chopping away, one hot hunk or babe at a time.
As the beautiful fall, Laura will run through the woods a lot bouncing up and down. Uh oh, there is a cabin, and all the hunks or babes that run to it for help will be in for a horrific surprise as soon as they open...well, you'll see. Then Laura runs through the forest some more bouncing up and down. Shelley will give us a gratuitous bikini scene just before she is...well, you'll see. Then the final 20 minutes...its wild and you'll have to watch closely....though Laura will continue running through the woods (she must have done 10 good miles in this film). The ending will hold some surprises and intense gore and the revelation of the true killer will be shocking.
A minor B actress, Cassie Daniels enjoyed her biggest role in this film. Did I mention she runs very well, especially through the woods? Why wasn't Cassie Daniels ever on "Baywatch"? What does Laura Gemser as "Emanuelle" have to do with this film? If someone ever wants to make a redneck "Emanuelle," Cassie Daniels would be the perfect one to cast. There are a lot of gory kills in this one and the axe-wielding maniac is quite ambitious. For some great slasher fun, with elements of "Baywatch" and "Emanuelle" thrown in, enjoy "Axegrinder" (directed by David Palmieri).

1 comment:

  1. I'm gunna park my truck in the woods and put on the DVD over a Moose Head, great stuff, this review show's your expertise , hell you should be narrating the trailers!!