Alright! I granted. This is a flawed film. Still...is there such a thing as a bad movie that includes a bikini/pool party massacre scene? Even better...two of the bikini babe damsels are Clara Hawn and Kaylee Kress! Ms. Hawn and Ms. Kress? Well...they are in...this movie! A movie with a bikini/pool party massacre scene! Kate Winslet never made it into any movies with that in it. Yeah, yeah...this film does make ancient Egypt and 3000 year old mummies look boring. But! That is what bikini/pool party massacre scenes are for. Sadly, Ms. Hawn will lose her head and Ms. Kress will...well, it won't be good. Today, from 2019, we look at Christine Parker's "Blood of the Mummy."
Louise (Laura Bridges) has a lot of explaining to do. Anyone in her life that has given her trouble has ended up with their heads pulled off, their organs pulled out, their limbs pulled off, etc. Sadly, Monica and Allison (our two aforementioned bikini babes), find this out the hard way. Okay, Louise will have a chance to explain all this to a psychiatrist (Bill Mulligan) in an asylum for the criminally insane. Did she do all this carnage? Well...if you believe her, a 3000 year old mummy who watches out for her, almost like a guardian angel, is responsible. This would make sense as the mummy (Terrance Watson) murdered her archaeologist mom and dad many years ago on a dig in Egypt.
Okay...Louise never shuts up in this film. She yaps and yaps. Why can't she be like most psychos in institutions and shut up! She doesn't and falls in love with another patient in the asylum, Asim (Justin Cole). I know...is it really a good idea to find your mate in a mental asylum? Okay, quiet! I hear you divorced guys out there...not a peep out of you. When the shrink recommends electro-shock therapy, Louise finds memories of herself in ancient Egypt, plotting to murder the king (her husband), and abscond with Kharis (Tremayne Blair). This won't go well and the consequences will extend into the 21st century.
Bloody and at times erotic, this flawed movie with a beset broad that won't shut up does have appeal. In addition to a bikini massacre scene, the gore level is pretty good. Hearts will be ripped out. Brains will be ripped out. Spines will be ripped out. Etc... Will Louise keep Asim as a lover or will she be able to rekindle her 3000 year old romance with Kharis? Will our two dead bikini babes find themselves coming back to life in a sequel? Are romances starting at mental asylums a good metaphor for the dating scene on American college campuses? Hey, this is a fun one. See "Blood of the Mummy" and don't feel you have to explain your movie taste to anyone.
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