Thursday, January 23, 2020

Cat Girl, Cat-Fighting...Literally!

Ah, a good cat-fight! This plot device always enhances a movie. In today's feature, 1957's "Cat Girl," we'll see cat-fighting. Our sultry protagonist (or is she an antagonist?) will have her claws out, in both feline and human form. Pretty women and slimy men better watch out as a woman's true nature is nothing to be cavalier about.
Our aforementioned sultry protagonist is Leonora (Barbara Shelley). She has been summoned to her Uncle Edmund's (Ernest Milton) mansion...and ordered to come alone. She's a dame so naturally she brings her unfaithful husband Richard (Jack May), his lover Cathy (Paddy Webster), and her inconsequential husband. Edmund, in private, lets Leonora know the family curse is about to be handed down to her and she mustn't ever have children. The family curse? Since you asked, it appears that the sole heir (or heiress) will become a deadly leopard when she gets angry...kinda like Bill Bixby in "The Incredible Hulk," except Barbara Shelley is prettier than the dweeb Bixby.
Edmund breaks the curse on himself and the leopard rips him to pieces. Now Leonora is Cat Girl! As her husband and Cathy take a walk and engage in extra-marital sex, she rips him apart...Cathy makes it back to the mansion. Leonora, now in human form, tears Cathy's dress off and claws at her...unfortunately, she is restrained. Old lover Brian, a psychiatrist, is called in. Brian doesn't believe the curse story and is stupid enough to introduce Leonora to his beautiful blonde wife, Dorothy (Kay Callard). By the way Leonora looks at Dorothy, now the wife of her old lover, we are reminded of how a rottweiler views a lamb chop. As Brian continues treating, and not believing Cat Girl, Leonora plots and Dorothy and her bleached blonde hair will be put in incredible danger.
Will the perky and vivacious blonde survive the wrath of the mysterious Leonora? Will a cat-fight, in either human or feline form, be in store for Leonora and her new rival? Will Brian ever get a clue and stop serving his pretty wife up as Meow Mix? This is a good one with some eerie English sets. As the sultry Leonora loses humanity, and the pretty are endangered, this becomes a vicious tale. Fans of cat-fights will enjoy this cat vs. human story. See "Cat Girl," directed by Alfred Shaughnessy.

Wednesday, January 22, 2020

Literature Review: The Sawgrass Footpath

Through and through horror! No comedic interludes. No chapters that give us a break from unrelenting horror. No plot devices that distract us from the horror at hand. horror. Hence Tressa Graves' 2015 novel The Sawgrass Footpath. Every word of this horror novel pulls us deeper into an abyss of pure hell and gore. Be warned...Tressa Graves will horrify you in this novel and not worry about sending you away gasping for some diversion out of bloody terror.
Tom is a doctor in Virginia. He and his lovely wife Ann are moving to Florida. Tom is escaping, though in these types of stories...there is never escape. Tom's parents were butchered a year earlier, the killers are still on the lam. Frightened by the thoughts of the last moments of their parents' lives, Tom packs up and heads to the Tampa area. Uh oh...his thoughts take on lives of their own and his ability to see the blood curdling events of the past may be more than his imagination playing havoc with his sanity. Southbound Tom and Ann go...but evil and fate have no geographic bounds.
Escaping evil is never simple and awaiting them in rural Florida is a house with the same evil past. The horror of the past comes alive for Tom, but perhaps for a more profound reason than to just scare him. As Tom is pulled into the bloody past of his new house, he realizes he and his wife are in mortal danger. As the most disgusting evil individuals ever put on Earth enter Tom and Ann's life, the horrific images of bloodshed from the past beckon Tom...but why...and to do what? Torture, humiliation, and intense destruction of person and psyche occur, Tom and Ann must hold some form of sanity together in order to fight back. Fight back they may, but evil (real evil that even intimidates the minions in Hell) doesn't often lose.
What did happen in the past that has attached itself to Tom is such horrific fashion? Can Tom make sense of the blood dripping ghostly apparitions that are trying to guide him? Warning...this is a horror story with no regard for your comfort. Tressa Graves has given us, in The Sawgrass Footpath, a fable of what true evil and horror look like, and the power they have to prevail over our own free will and determination. If you love dark horror, Tressa Graves is your new best friend. Read The Sawgrass Footpath and don't say you haven't been warned.
To read this book, click on this link The Sawgrass Footpath on Amazon

Tuesday, January 21, 2020

Harvest Lake, An Erotic Lovecraftian Tale

There will be heterosexual sex! There will be homosexual sex! There will be lesbian sex! There will be sex with tentacled monsters! There will be twosomes! There will be threesomes! There will be foursomes! There will be fivesomes! There will be sixsomes (if you include the tentacled monster)! Ah yes, when the sultry Cat (Tristan Riska) asks her bestie Jennifer (Ellie Church) to join her and her boyfriend Ben (Dan Nye) for a threesome as a birthday gift, we know we are in for a gratuitous time of it, in 2016's "Harvest Lake."
As our story begins a very pretty blonde (Lucretia Lynn) clad in a tight bikini wades into the lake. She'll come out and lead her BF (Derek Sturgeon) into the lake with her, never to emerge. Fast forward, five babes and hunks arrive at a cabin in the woods for pre-marital sex, alcohol consumption, and more pre-marital sex. Lucky for Josh (Jason Crowe), who is gay, Mark (Kevin Roach), who is also gay, shows up...they have a lot of sex. Uh oh...while Cat and Ben find weird egg things, seeping fluid in the woods, Jennifer wades into the lake to satisfy herself. While doing this a tentacled beast grabs her and finishes the job after pulling her under. Jennifer emerges, still Jennifer, and also possessed by the tentacled thing.
As for Ben's birthday gift, Cat and Jennifer, who is now a monster, too, take Ben into a bedroom of the cabin for wild sex. Uh oh, Jennifer does a fine job satisfying both Cat and elongated tentacle does wonders for both men and you might already know. The nude Jennifer will now go after our gay couple, who are really going at it. The tentacled creature's libido is intense and it leaves the lake. As Jennifer tries her best to get the gay couple, she takes plenty of breaks for more threesomes with Ben and Cat. The now, not quite human, Jennifer is now quite insistent about sex and is having trouble getting Josh and Mark to partake.
Will either Jennifer or the tentacled monster succeed in getting Mark and Josh to stop looking at each other and maybe experiment with either girls or tentacled monsters? Even if it means being conquered by a tentacled monster, would we give in to a threesome that included Cat and Jennifer? Is there really any need to ask any more questions or can we just enjoy "Harvest Lake" as a gratuitous jaunt through sexual escapades from so many different perspectives? I'm sure you're curious, but if you watch this film, tell two friends about it...or use it as an introduction to asking them if they want to partake in a...wait...never mind, I'm getting silly here. Enjoy "Harvest Lake," directed by Scott Schirmer.

Sunday, January 19, 2020

Unseen Evil, Invisible Creature and an Indian Babe

Ah Dana (Cindy Pena)! An Indian babe hired as a guide by thugs. This poor unfortunate lady will captivate us with her beauty and is the only pure soul in our story. As us guys drool over her we must endure her very unpleasant fate. She'll be pummeled by a brute, tied up and led around like a dog, be forced to bed down tied up to another babe hostage, be led around like a dog again, and then have her alluring buttocks bitten into by a monster. I know you gals are thinking, "what a way to go!" As she bleeds profusely through her tight jeans the same monster severs her jugular seeing Dana's blood spurt all over the forest as if this was a Japanese Kung Fu horror yarn. Hence 2001's "Unseen Evil.
Centuries ago ancients' seal a treasure of gold artifacts in a cave...and awaken a toothy and invisible creature. Now the aforementioned Dana is hired by Professor Peter Jensen (Richard Hatch) to guide him and his team to the cave. The good professor isn't so good and desires to loot the treasure. Accompanying Peter are two thugs (Jare Jon and Frank Ruotolo)...and his former lover/student assistant Kate (Cindi Braun). Quickly Peter's intentions become known and his men pummel the nubile Dana and put her in bondage. Now the tied up Dana is forced to lead the looters to her ancestors' sacred grounds. Kate is also a victim and she'll be tied up too, sometimes attached to Dana.
The team gets to the cave and Peter goes to work looting. As Dana challenges Williams (Jon) to a fight to the death she gets untied...and is then humiliated and sliced by the invisible creature. Now the remaining four are hunted by this thing. The survivors realize there is a relationship to the monster and the treasure, but Kate's knowledge of Indian wall-markings reveals that anyone who touches the gold will die horribly. With Dana long gone, Kate assumes the role of head-babe in this film and lays a moral guilt trip on her human tormentors...she begs them to return the gold. Nothing doing, Peter is way past caring about the ancient traditions and burial grounds of a once proud people.
Will Kate prevail given the fact that she respects the burial grounds? Is Dana's humiliating demise a sharp metaphor for the U.S. Government's continued humiliation of a once great people by looting their lands and enabling corrupt chiefs to enslave their own people in corrupt and sleazy casinos? The deaths and gore are terrific and the ending is quirky and refreshing...and of course, Dana is a joy to watch. For some gratuitous and toothy-creature fun, enjoy "Unseen Evil," directed by Jay Woelfel.

Friday, January 17, 2020

Run! Bitch Run!, Catholic High School Girls Humiliated

They'll be stripped! They'll be humiliated! They'll have the snot raped out of them! What do exploitation film makers have against Catholic High School girls? Perhaps they are servicing the fetishes of a deviant male-misogynistic culture (to include Japanese businessmen). Or perhaps these plot lines awake the inner rebellion in all of us countering the order and precision western society tries to force upon us. Or, perhaps in the case of Joseph Guzman (the director), perhaps he wants to blow 1979's "I Spit on Your Grave" out of the water. Today we look at 2009's "Run! Bitch Run!"
Catherine (Cheryl Lyone) and Rebecca (Christina DeRosa) are two beautiful Catholic High gals going door to door selling bibles in order to raise money for St. Mary's Catholic School. Uh oh...they knock on the wrong door. Lobo (Peter Tahoe) is a brutish, coke-sniffing, brothel boss in a redneck town. As our beauties, clad in Catholic high school garb, ring his door bell, they witness him murdering one of his whores. Before they can escape, the homicidal whore Marla (Ivet Corvea) and Lobo's right-hand man Clint (John Winscher) catch them. Clint will strip and grope Rebecca and Marla will humiliate and force her to perform oral sex on her. Alas, Rebecca's fate will be quite tragic as the sadistic Marla forces her prey to play Russian Roulette. Now Lobo wants some fun and forces Catherine to play a version of Hide-and-Seek, called "Find 'em and F*** 'em."
Giving Catherine a short head start, Lobo catches her and rapes her to pieces. Humiliated and broken, Catherine, by some miracle survives. Completely nude and unable to speak, the almost comatose Catherine is brought to a hospital. She'll recover and escape clad in a stolen white nurse's uniform. Yep, you guessed it. She'll utilize a doctor's scalpel, machete, a .357 Magnum, and a shotgun upon her return to Lobo's town. Seemingly possessed, Catherine sets out on a journey to inflict bloody vengeance on Marla, Clint, Lobo, and anyone in their vicinity.
Humorless and graphic, this is one that will appeal to prurient tastes and perhaps does top the gratuitous nature of "I Spit on Your Grave."  Fans of early 1970s exploitation (sexploitation, perhaps) will enjoy this one. In a world where political correctness and an irrelevant standard of respecting the opposite sex is inflicted upon us, "Run! Bitch Run!" may indeed have some relevance to the rebellious nature inside all of us, and act as a fable for those hungering something outside the norms of modern day sensitivity. 

Wednesday, January 15, 2020

The Wizard of Gore, Internal Organs Fly at You

Herschell Gordon Lewis is affectionately known to us as 'The Godfather of Gore.' Well, today we take a look at The Godfather of Gore's magnum opus...1970's "The Wizard of Gore." Low-budget, drive-in, other words...horror Nirvana! Be warned...nothing is implied in this one. Intestines...kidneys...livers...severed tongues...stomachs will be ripped out and thrown at you in an elongated fashion. Watch if you dare. The victims? Beautiful women all with amazing legs...perhaps a fetish of Mr. Lewis.
Montag the Magnificent (Ray Sager) has quite a magic act. As the film begins we see him decapitated by a guillotine as his jugular keeps pumping blood after the head is severed. It gets better. A beautiful woman (Karin Alexana) volunteers (or does she?) to be sawed in half. With a chainsaw Montag cuts her in half. We see her abdomen opened and Montag pull out her organs. Uh oh...the audience sees something quite different. As the audience appears to see the beauty survive and walk off stage. Later in a restaurant, the woman is found gutted in her booth. We'll also see another beauty (Corinne Kirkin) get a spike through her head and Montag will pull out her brains. Same result...audience sees her survive and later this lady is found dead with a spike through her head.
Enter the sultry TV host Sherri (Judy Cler) and her sportswriter beau Jack (Wayne Ratay). Sherri wants Montag on her show but Jack is suspicious. After several beautiful women who volunteered for Montag's act are found gutted, Jack gets the cops involved. The many witnesses saw the ladies leave the theater intact. Jack and Sherri will have a lot of pre-marital sex, but will get back to investigating Montag. As the day comes when Montag agrees to do an illusion on Sherri's TV show, we gather Sherri may be the next babe gutted or pulled apart.
How is Montag getting away with murder? Why doesn't the audience see the carnage that is occurring? Will the nubile and leggy Sherri be Montag's next victim? This is a gory one as I have left out some of the gorier kills. Ah the beautiful die quite horribly and we hope that Sherri can prevail. The ending is wild...quite gory...and very ambitious. For a drive-in classic that will have many of you averting your eyes, enjoy "The Wizard of Gore."

Monday, January 13, 2020

Don't Open the Door, A Damsel and Telephone Rape

How does one get raped over the telephone? It is a stretch, but in an old drive-in horror/exploitation film, even a rotary telephone can be a perverted weapon. A nubile blonde damsel, helpless and naive...a psycho with a prurient attraction to her...and a town full of peeps, all with motives. Motives for what? Today we look at 1974's "Don't Open the Door" (aka "Don't Hang Up"), directed by S.F. Brownrigg...and yes...she should've hung up.
The aforementioned nubile blonde, Amanda (Susan Bracken), is mysteriously summoned to her grandmother's mansion. Grandma (Rhea MacAdams) is on her death bed and her doctor refuses to put her in the hospital. Amanda is furious and brings in her own BF Nick (Hugh Feagin) to act as the attending physician...he is useless so we shall not speak of him again (right right right...aren't all men useless? I saw that coming). Oh yeah...13 years ago, Amanda's mom was stabbed to death in her room and Amanda found the bloody corpse...but never mind that for now. Amanda disrupts the goings on in the small town as everyone remembers her when she was all the old geysers desire deviant sex with her.
Enter pervert and museum curator...Claude Kern (Larry O'Dwyer). She wants all of Amanda's grandmother's possessions after she passes. He has set up a museum in her tribute. As the weird townspeople sweat a lot and lick their lips, Claude secretes himself in the walls of the mansion and makes obscene calls to Amanda, even when he spies the blonde bathing. Amanda is pretty gullible and answers the phone and even "touches" herself all over when Claude commands. Now Claude gets homicidal as we now assume he murdered Amanda's mom years ago. Amanda screams, runs through the house, and is sexually assaulted, while Claude gets more perverted and sweats more.
What is Claude's plans for the nubile Amanda, and just why did he murder Amanda's mom? Is there a secret hidden in this town regarding Amanda's mom? Does every aging male have a sweaty upper lip, or does Amanda bring that out in them? This is a wild one and not the feel good film of 1974. For some gratuitous drive-in horror with not a whole lot of satisfaction as far as the plot goes, see "Don't Open the Door."