Cyborg 2: Glass Shadow, Angelina Jolie Does Blade Runner

Before Angelina Jolie was the annoying being that she is today, she was a cyborg in a sequel to a Jean-Claude Van Damme film. Remember Sean Young as the sultry cyborg who runs off with Harrison Ford at the end of "Blade Runner"? Well, we wondered if the man and machine duo could find happiness, that was left an open question. Same deal here as a sultry cyborg falls in love...but can it work, especially if Jack Palance is spying her every move? Hence 1992's "Cyborg 2: Glass Shadow."

In the year 2074 Earth is in ruins and an American company and a Japanese company compete to furnish the elite with cyborgs. Cyborgs to fight in wars, cyborgs to provide wild sex...what a world! Pinwheel Corporation has an idea, destroy its Japanese competitor.  As our film begins we see pleasure cyborg Dreena (Renee Allman) having that wild sex with a schmuck...she climaxes...she explodes. Yep, a counter-espionage cyborg designed to explode upon climax. With the successful test they fill up sultry cyborg Cash (Jolie). Uh oh, Dreena was Cash's BFF and when Cash comes across her remains, the not-beautiful-anymore Dreena warns her.

Cash is as close to human as a cyborg can be and her goal in life is a lot of wild sex with her personal trainer, Colt (Elias Koteas). With the help of Mercy (Jack Palance), a mysterious being...you'll see, the two escape to find love above ground. Pinwheel wants her back and sends sultry cyborg assassin Chen (Karen Sheperd) after them. Some great cat-fights will ensue between these two cyborg beauties. Even more menacing, Pinwheel sends Bench (Billy Drago) after them, too. Bench is a true psycho heavily concerned about his vanity. He'll even mix it up with Chen. As Colt and Cash continue to fall deeper in love, Chen and Bench get angrier and more violent, and Pinwheel sends in heavily armed troops. Never fear, Mercy has an outlandish plan for the lovebirds escape.

Exactly who or what is Mercy and can he be trusted? Will Colt and Cash have the same questions facing them as Sean Young and Harrison Ford did? Why can't pleasure cyborgs ever find true happiness in these films and will Cash's fate differ? Okay, I know, the thought of a sultry babe blowing up during climax is too easy a metaphor to pass on, but out of good taste, I will pass on it. For some neat cyborg carnage, cyborg love, and cyborg sex, see "Cyborg 2: Glass Shadow," directed by Michael Schroeder.