House of the Damned, Haunted House Surprises

Haunted mansion, actually. The setting for this one is an isolated old mansion deep in the California mountains. The original owner? In a mental asylum for blowing off a guy's head. Last resident? Unknown. Yep, we have the makings for a nice Gothic type horror film, filled with ghosts, screams, and...well, you'll see. Oh, guess who is in it? Richard Kiel! The Jaws guy from "Octopussy." He plays...a giant! Go figure. Today we look at 1963's "House of the Damned," directed by Maury Dexter.

Finding work is tough for hunk architect Scott (Ron Foster). His sultry blonde wife Nancy (Merry Anders) is quite supportive. Yay! A job! Hunk real estate lawyer Joseph (Richard Crane) has a job for them. Go to the abandoned Rochester mansion and survey it to get it ready for sale. Scott and Nancy are thrilled...they won't stay thrilled. Joseph and his sultry wife, Loy (Erika Peters) will meet them at the mansion in a day or two to help out. Scott and Nancy arrive at the mysterious house and have 13 keys that will open 50 doors. Big spooky place.  Uh oh...we get indications that our lovebirds are not alone in the house. Then, while they sleep, something hideous crawls into their bedroom and steals the keys. When they wake, Scott and Nancy can't figure out where the keys went. All is well as the beautiful and flirty Loy shows up. Actually Scott is well, Nancy is peeved as she correctly surmises Loy is a...skank.

Where's Joe? Loy wants to know. Scott and Nancy have a lot of work to do and Loy strips out of her clothes, into a swimsuit, and goes sunbathing. We like Loy...a lot better than Nancy likes her. Joe shows up and Loy yells at him and storms out. She won't get far as on the other side of a door she opens is...is... well, you'll see. Now the three look for Loy. uh oh...creepy stuff happens and there is someone in the cabinet watching their every move...in bed. Uh oh...some thing that creeps is also astir in the house. Uh oh...well, Richard Kiel is also prowling around.  Uh oh...the rooms that don't have keys? Well Scott and Joseph decide to bust them down as they search for Loy after Nancy saw...saw...oh, it's awful, you'll see.

Where is Loy and did Richard Kiel take her as his unwilling bride? Why did Joe get to the house way after his wife? Is the Rochester woman (Georgia Schmidt) really locked in an asylum or did she get out? Nancy and Loy are true babes and lend a great cheese factor to this film. Scott and Joseph are hunks and lend a nice beef factor. Behind the locked doors...well...you'll see. Oh, the ending! Wow! See "House of the Damned" and be shocked when you meet the damned.

Dredd, Justice in the Future

Okay, today we have "Escape From New York" meets "RoboCop." Not a bad combo.  I mean, it ain't like we have to watch a film that combines "Mrs. Soffel" and "The English Patient." Nope... carnage... violence...gore...machine guns...incendiaries...daggers...and a cute blonde.  Sylvester Stallone already did this character, Dredd, a number of years earlier, and we can debate the need for this Karl Urban rendition, but this 3D film is so much fun, no matter how much it was not needed. Today we look at 2012's "Dredd," directed by Pete Travis.

Yep...you know the general plot. A mega-city is out of control in the not too distant future. Crime has taken over and judges now have the power to be judge, juries, and executioners. Dredd (Urban) is one such bloke...and he is merciless, perhaps appropriately so. As the film begins he mows down three druggies. Now he is assigned a partner, a not quite ready for prime time babe, Anderson (Olivia Thirlby). The blond babe seems to have what it takes to be blown away on her first day on duty...except... Yep, she's no ordinary babe, she is a mutant.  Her mutation? Psychic! Now Dredd and her answer a call at the worst tenement building in the city and find themselves walking into a buzzsaw. 

So here is the deal. Ma-Ma (Lena Headey) is the crime lord running all the manufacturing and distribution of a brand new narcotic, called Slo-Mo. Her base of operations is the top floor of this tenement skyscraper. When Dredd and Anderson show up, and by the way, Anderson looks very nice in her black leather tactical suit, Ma-Ma is determined not to let them ruin her operation. She locks down the building, cuts off communications, and has her thugs and every building resident hunt our judges. Now everyone in the building hunts them and Anderson is warned that if they catch her, Ma-Ma will make her wish she committed suicide instead of being taken alive. A catfight between Ma-Ma and Anderson? You'll see. Grenades, machineguns, explosives, and attitude will prevail in this war. Oh, there is a death scene at the end of the movie that is just so poetic, it should be a mandatory scene in any movie made today.

Just what will Ma-Ma do to Anderson if she takes her prisoner?  Will Dredd fall in love with the nubile blonde mutant psychic?  Will the death toll exceed 200...and how many of the deaths will be in 3D? Sure, not a movie we needed after the Stallone entry, but enjoyable and satisfying nonetheless. Prophetic and therapeutic, "Dredd" is a film you will thoroughly enjoy." 

The Last Hail M.A.R.Y, Space-Bimbos Save the World

Save the world? Ha! They try, but the bimbos, like anything in history, need a man to arrive to really save things. Still, if the astronettes are sultry...well...that's all we can ask for. As the Artemis program proves to be the country's largest jobs program and still has not put anyone on the moon, the space program needs a boost. Perhaps babes in space is the way to go. At least, we like looking at them. Our feature today, from our buddies at The Asylum, is 2026's "The Last Hail M.A.R.Y.," directed by Marc Gottlieb.

Okay, the great war against Mars is over, finally. An uneasy truce exists. Sadly, an even greater nemesis for Earth emerges. The sun's core is dying causing the star to expand. It expands so far that the sun engulfs Mercury. Sad! Now it threatens Venus...and after Venus? Yep...us! The ISS, no not that one, the Interplanetary Space Station, manned with babes, is tasked with saving the solar system. The commander is Lorraine (Esmeree Sterling). She's an idiot and in her own incompetence may destroy the ISS and Earth without the sun's help. Still, she is real cute and wears her lip gloss well, so we like her. She yells at everyone but in all fairness, her crew all yell back. The Mission Specialist is the babe redhead Solange (Juliette Cecile). She's grouchy and is pals with Hinata (Lei Kiryu), who cries a lot. Okay, there are others but we like Truman (Mica Javier) the best...total babe. Sadly, Truman dies horribly and is gone early in the film.

The sun swallows Venus sooner than expected and Earth is only hours away. Lorraine is clueless and keeps yelling at the other babes. Along comes a Martian, Icluf (Brennen Amonett). He arrives in his spaceship claiming he knows how to stop the sun from expanding and how to save Earth. Problem is no Earthling trusts a Martian and Lorraine is content to screw things up all by herself. Finally, the Martian wins their trust, sort of, and now that a man is on board the ISS, there is a chance the Earth just may be saved. We still miss Truman...but the beautiful die way too early in space. Now Earthlings and Martians must work together to save Earth, and consequently, Mars too, 'cause they are next. Yes, there are a couple of men in this film, other than Icluf, but they are neutered by the domineering babes. 

Hey, they brought Spock back...maybe Truman will be resurrected for the sequel...we can only hope. Divorced guys, who have been savaged by babes, will understand this film. Our boys at The Asylum have given us a fun one that only rates a 2.8 out of 10 on IMDB's rating scale. Will grouchy Lorraine be able to make just one half of a competent move during her command in this apocalyptic event?  Will Icluf run from the station and try to find some more men to work with?  Is this a film where we all will be cheering for the sun to explode? Have some fun in your next movie watching experience and see "The Last Hail M.A.R.Y."  

Trick and Treats, Buxom Lovelies Die Horribly

Not an easy one to watch.  The cast is filled with well built young ladies, dressed in erotic Halloween costumes, displaying large portions of their boobs, and very short tight skirts. They max out on the kinkiness as one is in a scanty Catholic schoolgirls costume, and another is in a leather cat costume. Sadly...what happens to them will ensure they will no longer be lovely.  The misogyny in this film is intense and what  happens to one pretty one with a weed-whacker will be so wrong. Never fear, the demon is played by Malcolm McDowell. Our feature today is 2025's "Trick and Treats," directed by Eric Hector.

Okay, there is a neat and horrific backstory about Peter the Pumpkin Eater from the 19th century.  You'll see it. Present day, three skanks dressed provocatively, showing mega cleavage, and their buddy, the soon to be dead David (Emmanuel Carter) head to a Halloween party in rural America. The babes are the bi-polar Ashley (Lauren Ledesma), Laura (Carmen Moreno), and Kelly (Victorya Brandart) and after Ashley has a psychic vision, the car goes off road and is disabled.  The unfortunate quartet walk to a biker bar where they are converged on by rapist bikers. Oh, at this bar is a demon possessed pumpkin.  Gary Busey as Pastor Joe tries to steal it, but was thwarted by the bartender Billy (Gregory Hardigan). The pumpkin is possessed by a Halloween demon named Trick (McDowell).  When the rapists jump the babes, paw them, fondle them, grope them, and tie them up, Trick telepathically talks to Ashley about how to save herself.

The dames are brought into three different rooms and bikers engage in torturing them and mutilating them. Oh, the weed-whacker scene is almost too hard to take. The beautiful will no longer remain beautiful, except Ashley.  Ashley, with coaching from Trick, gets into the heads of the bikers and decimates them psychologically.  Now, even though she is tied up, Ashley seems to have the upper hand.  Now Ashley gets loose, gets a knife, and sets off to find and free her two buddies. Oh, David? Forget about him...he was offed right away. Ashley will now have to kill and Trick will explain to her just how to do it. The kills will be gory and the babes will not be out of danger now that they are no longer restrained. Just like any demon, Trick has some tricks in store for Ashley, too.

Will the bi-polar Ashley be able to keep it all together and save her buddies?  What else does Trick have in store for Ashley other than murdering the rapist bikers?  Is this 2025 movement a pendulum-reaction to the now defunct #MeToo movement that capitalized on wokeness?  This is a bloody one and what happens to the beautiful dames will not be easy to watch.  Still, Malcolm McDowell is terrific, and Ashley's plight is a compelling one.  See "Trick and Treats" and get set for a sequel which is on its way.   

The Blade Cuts Deeper, Slasher Film from Norway

Oh, those Norwegians!  Deep down they're as sick and demented as us Americans. Give them a big knife, a movie camera, and nubile blondes and suddenly, they give us a slasher film. Oh, those Norwegian blonde beauties? Yeah...they won't remain beauties long as some sicko with a big knife decides to play a puritanical soul.  Our feature today is 2024's "The Blade Cuts Deeper," directed by Gene Dolders.

John Abbott (John Tueart) hosts a TV show in which gruesome crimes are recreated for the TV audience. The last episode, in detail, recreated the sniper serial killer's last killing, a pregnant babe as her husband was embracing her. Now John's hocking the TV show at a film convention and the audience appears cool to him and his plight. Uh oh...someone is in the audience who may be even more critical. In the recreation, the lovely blonde Olivia (Kristin Jaap) plays the pregnant wife. She plays her well...and dies well. Afterwards, John treats her like garbage and makes her walk home. John treats all his crew like garbage. Olivia is followed home and a killer overpowers her and what results is Olivia's heartbreaking and humiliating murder. The killer (Peter Durr) then heads over to the studio where John and his art crew and editors are working late.

John demeans everyone he meets at the studio. Poor John, hardly anyone showed up at the film festival to hear him hock his exploitation show. We meet Jill (Lucy Renton), a pretty gal from the art department.  Sadly, she will also meet the killer.  The killer has gotten into the studio and hunts down crew members one by one.  Who is this killer? Sadly, we figure that out from the outset so there is no mystery in that. The kills are bloody and the weapon is usually a big knife or a screwdriver.  

Will our slasher murder everyone in the studio?  Will John survive the wrath of this maniac, or will he be saved for the last kill?  Has the disintegration of NATO helped Norway along with ditching artsy-fartsy productions and embracing slasher ones?  Believe it or not, the message delivered by this film is incredibly relevant to our media driven society.  For a bloody one, in the spirit of a true 80s type slasher film, see "The Blade Cuts Deeper." 

Reborn, Junkyard Body-Horror

Body horror? What is it? Watch this film and find out.  Sure, David Cronenberg had a nice career doing it. It is the type of horror that easily gets us to turn our heads or wince. Today we have one that is body horror to the max. Oh, what the fiend will do to so many nubile babes...and some hunks. This is not an easy one to watch and many of you won't make it to the halfway point. Let us look at 2009's "Reborn" (aka "Machined Reborn"), directed by Craig McMahon.

Cade (Jimmy Flowers) buys a junkyard...and moves his pretty wife Jess (Davina Joy) there with him. Mistake. She sweats a lot, gets nude, and has steamy sweaty sex with him. She'll be abducted as she admires her nude self by...well, a serial killer named Dan (David C. Hayes). Dan cuts her legs and arms off, screws things into her, tortures her with straps that tighten, and nails her to a chair. Yep...most of you will have turned this film off by now. Now Cade is forced by Dan to kill anyone who steps into the junkyard or he will murder Jess.  Sad...Jess is no way surviving this ordeal. Uh oh...Dan is also a machinist and screws some metal onto Cade to make him an iron killer. Cade is also fitted with spikes so he won't be easy to tackle. 

Trespassers and other assorted folks come onto the junkyard. Dan has the place rigged with surveillance cameras and insists Cade do his killings in front of the cameras.  Cade complies.  If he doesn't, Dan will tighten the straps on the nude and not entirely whole Jess.  Poor Jess. More will die as they step onto the grounds of the junkyard. Then Teresa (Kathleen Benner arrives). This babe is a realtor that insisted this property not be sold. Behind her back, the junkyard property was sold to Cade. See, Teresa's sister was murdered by a serial killer on this land and she is terrified of it.  With two other realtors she invades the junkyard with the hopes of warning Cade and Jess...but this won't go well.

What will be Teresa's fate as she tries to avenge the murder of her sister?  Will the machine-fitted Cade have any humanity left in him after he kills a dozen times or so? Just who is this Dan guy and will he ever do any of the killings himself? Gory and revolting...if you make it through the entire film, you will not be able to ever forget some of the imagery.  For a real horror shocker, see "Reborn."

Apology, An Apologetic Serial Killer

Wow! What an ending.  Sure, in this 1980s slasher film, we have to endure an uber awkward sex scene between Peter Weller and Lesley Ann Warren.  Sure, as twisted as these two look while doing the scene, it is not unpleasant to view on the small screen. Small screen? Yep, an HBO Productions movie, and later distributed by both HBO and Cannon. Oh, but what an ending...hardly a low-budget one. This gritty New York police thriller from 1986 is "Apology," directed by Robert Bierman.

Wow! Lily (Warren) is a sultry sculptor of modern art. This is her weird project.  Lily sets up an answering machine and advertises a phone number to call and confess your awful crimes as an apology. Weirdos call.  With these recordings of the weird apologies, Lily will use them as inspiration for her colossal steel sculpture that looks like the set of an epic spaceship movie. An artist in New York, most of Lily's male friends are homosexual. Yep, a serial killer is chopping up homosexuals and cutting off their schlongs (the movie's term, not mine). Uh oh...the killer, Claude (Jimmie Ray Weeks) calls the apology line and apologizes. Now Lily has a serial killer calling her line. Enter Detective Rad Hungate (Weller). Rad is instantly attracted to Lily. Lily plays hard to get but we know she wants him.

The weird duo end up rolling in the sack together as Claude keeps killing homosexuals, including associates of Lily. Now Rad and Lily fall in love...though they really look awkward together. Claude begins calling Lily all the time, killing more people she knows, and is now surveilling her. Rad works tirelessly to catch Claude.  Uh oh...Claude feels betrayed that Lily is sleeping with the police and not sympathetic to his plight. Lily now has more of a reason to be afraid.  Claude decides to kill someone very special to her.

Will Rad be able to protect Lily, in and out of the sack?  Will Lily's sculpture ever reach completion, and will it be used as a prop in one of Ridley Scott's "Alien" movies?  Really, you should see this thing.  Could HBO have hired an intimacy coordinator to work with both Ms. Warren and Mr. Weller regarding their love scenes?  Not that those scenes were unpleasant, but they were...weird! See "Apology" and see Peter Weller and Lesley Ann Warren like you never have.

Too Scared to Scream, Nubile Babes Knifed in Apartment Building

Giallo!  This plot is so Giallo!  Not Giallo, though.  This is a New York movie through and through. But, gotta love the tip of the hat to the subgenre of Giallo. Nubile babes, in throes of eroticism, nude and sweaty, in hot tubs or in intimates...knifed by a puritanical killer with a great big knife. In a terrific apartment building slasher film, enjoy an all-star cast, in 1984's "Too Scared to Scream," directed by Tony Lo Bianco.

Cynthia (Victoria Bass), a sultry babe returns home to the Royal Arms, a fancy NY apartment building. She, in her slinky evening gown, catches the eye of the classy doorman, Vincent (Ian McShane). She goes up to her apartment, strips, takes a very gratuitous shower, then is knifed to death by Vincent. Sad. So pretty and died so viciously. Vincent? Lives in a mansion with his invalid mother (Maureen O'Sullivan). Detective Alex (Mike Connors) is on the case. So is his partner, Frank (Leon Isaac Kennedy). Alex suspects Vincent, but Vincent is smooth. Then an old lady who comes onto Vincent is cut to little pieces in her apartment.  Seems any female who comes onto Vincent is soon murdered. Then we find out Vincent is a homosexual, but seems genuinely aroused by the babes of the Royal Arms. Then fashion model Nadine (Karen Rushmore), after sweating nude in the sauna, a gratuitous shower, and donning some silky intimates, has her throat cut.  She also came onto Vincent.

Knowing Vincent is the killer, Alex uses his girlfriend Kate (Anne Archer), undercover. Kate is a policewoman and will move into the building and flirt with Alex.  Vincent is smart and Kate gets to know him...and his invalid mother. Uh oh...Alex and Frank figure out Vincent's backstory and the backstory of the invalid mother. Now they know Kate is in peril. More killings with the big knife.  As Anne puts on some nice tight leotards and practices some dance, Vincent acts.

Wait!  If this is a Giallo-like movie, is this too easy?  Or is there a surprise ending? If Vincent is a homosexual, why would he be turned on and threatened by sultry dames flirting with him? How about Maureen O'Sullivan? Is she really an invalid? This is heavy on eroticism, sweaty and nude babes, Mike Connors grunting, and the slaughter of the beautiful. For a vicious slasher film with a decided Italian flare to it, see "Too Scared to Scream."   

The Stay Awake, Catholic High School Girls in Trouble

I remember going to the drive-in in the 70s. My dad took me to see a double feature, "The Boob Tube" and "Kentucky Fried Movie." My dad wasn't into Disney, and yes the films were inappropriate for children, but I loved it. I forget in which film, but one of the skits had a spoof of an exploitation film trailer called "Catholic High School Girls in Trouble." In it, sultry dames , in Catholic high school garb, were attacked, stripped, pulled into the shower, and...well...you can imagine. Today we have the closest thing we can find to the fulfilment of that skit, a 1988 South African horror film, "The Stay Awake," directed by John Bernard.

In 1969, 11 Catholic high school girls were brutally raped and murdered by William John Brown (Lindsay Reardon) at a Catholic girls high school...in America. Brown is executed in the gas chamber, but is in cahoots with the devil, so he will emerge 20 years later at St. Mary's Catholic High School for girls...in Europe. At the school, over the weekend, eight or nine girls are doing a stay awake to raise money for it. The chaperone is the sultry teacher, Trish (Shirley Jane Harris). As we meet the girls, Samantha (Tanya Gordon) is a nubile babe in a hot shiny aerobics outfit, leading her classmates in gratuitous and thrusting exercises. Then the ghost of Brown returns and manifests as a demon or slithery tentacle things. One by one he hunts these girls in the dark hallways, captures them, and readies them to be the brides of Satan. Happens. Oh, four boys from the local college, aware of the stay awake, sneak into the school but are summarily taken apart by a big bug-eyed demon.

One by one the girls misbehave, and some even smoke a cigarette, and go off on their own. Mistake. Now Trish tries to find the missing girls, and realizes she is battling a demon and the ghost of Brown. The demon wants Trish bad, but the cross she wears keeps it at bay. Samantha, the aerobics instructor, our favorite of the girls, screams really well and looks so helpless.  The demon sends tentacles out to capture the babes, and to...to...well, use your imagination. Now Trish realizes she must battle the ghost of Brown, kill the demon, and save the remaining nubiles.

Will the Catholic High School babes engage in catfights over boys or for who the demon will want most?  What is Trish' connection to Brown that makes her so wanted by his ghost? Is this film made by Lutherans who seek to confuse and corrupt Catholic babes? You will be waiting for the demon to screech, "THE POPE CAN'T HELP YOU NOW, HUSSIES!" This is a good and gratuitous one that most of us missed back in the 80s. For a nubile babes in peril film, see "The Stay Awake."

A Breed Apart, The Dog Version of Jurassic Park

Have you wondered where Hayden Panettiere has gone? Wonder no more! Found her!  Hopefully thousands of rabid digs looking for humans meet will not find her. Or more pertinently, hopefully those wild dogs will be able to elude her. We finally have a Hayden Panettiere film where she is equipped with an attack helicopter, grenades, rocket launchers, and a good script. Okay, maybe not a great script, but a better script than "Heroes." If you liked "Jurassic Park," you will love this one...or maybe not. Let us look at the babe and hunk heavy "A Breed Apart" from 2025, directed by Griff Furst and Nathan Furst.

Hayden Hearst (Panettiere) is filming an action film on a tropical island about a pack of wild dogs eating the tourists...then the tamed dogs get bitten by bats and really become rabid.  Cast and crew must flee the tropical paradise movie set leaving the entire island to the dogs. 13 years later, Vince Ventura (Joey Bragg), the #1 Influencer/content creator in the world has built a mansion on the island but has one problem. The rabid dogs reign...and there are thousands of them. Idea! Invite five of the most popular influencers in the world to come clean it up. The one who kills the most dogs wins a fortune. So here come the sultry Violet (Grace Caroline Currey), her brother Collins (Zack Steiner), the evil Mason (Troy Gentile), the beautiful Queen (Riele Downs), and our favorite, Farmer Jay (Page Kennedy). Oh, Vince's GF Thalia (Virginia Gardner) is a Twizzler chewing babe bad-ass, who drives the helicopter to the island. We like her a lot!

Now the influencers are told why they are there, and they are not happy. Vince insists on demonstrating the dogs are docile but this results in him being torn to shreds. Now the influencers are scrambling and running for their lives. The dogs are determined and even get to the top of the cell tower.  The influencers bicker and show their selfishness but finally agree to work together. This won't go too well, as they are also really stupid. Thalia emerges as our favorite as she is hot, and has some cool weapons...sadly, they are for paintball and flares...none are fatal. The dogs are mangy, ferocious, and monstrous. What's worse, Collins accidentally ODs on hallucinogens and now Violet and the troops must babysit him as they evade the fangs. Oh, get ready, a Great White shark will make an appearance as the dogs swim well. Just when all looks lost...here comes Hayden Hearst, 13 years after the ill-fated movie shoot on this same island.

Will Thalia and Violet engage in either a catfight or a steamy shower scene with dogs barking in the background?  Will the dogs find a lawyer to rip apart as he uses the port-o-potty? Will Thalia get to use any of Hayden's real weapons? This is a gratuitous one that is action-packed. A cross between "Jurassic Park" and "Cujo" perhaps, the nice f/x and the cheese and beef factors will make this a pleasurable watch. See "A Breed Apart" and fall in love with Hayden Panettiere all over again.  

Raw Nerve, Sandahl Bergman and Traci Lords

Wait! Sandahl Bergman teamed up with Traci Lords? Now, that's a combo! First, however, we need to talk about the men in this thriller.  Glenn Ford teamed up with...Jan-Michael Vincent? Yep.  I must say when these two heavyweights of cinema are on the screen together, the phrase that comes to mind is..."painful rectal itch."  It ain't pretty.  You think that ain't pretty! Well, Randall 'Tex' Cobb is also in this. Let's get back to the pretty, Traci Lords in tight halter tops, long shiny red high heels, bare legs, and vulnerable.  Sandahl Bergman...yeah, her, too! Let us look at 1991's "Raw Nerve," directed by David A. Prior.

Two sultry twins (Mary and Donna Willard), in party dresses and red high-heels, are slaughtered at a carnival funhouse by...by...well, therein lies the mystery. Racecar driver Jimmy (Ted Prior) wipes out taking a turn on the racetrack when he has visions of the murders that occurred the night before. He goes home to his skank sister, Gina (Lords). Gina is a high school senior accepted into a pre-med program...and she is all slut. She dresses like a whore but older brother Jimmy acts as a dad and takes care of her. Blake (Cobb) is Jimmy's uncle and also mechanic and worries about the racer.  Jimmy is also worried when he reads about the murders he witnessed in his visions in the newspaper. Now Jimmy goes to the cops and is thrown out of the station by Detective Bruce Ellis (Vincent) and his captain, the grouchy Gavin (Ford). 

Uh oh, sultry reporter Gloria (Bergman) was at the police station and overhears Jimmy's story of visions and she ends up believing him. Now Gloria falls in love with Jimmy and instantly has pre-marital sex with him when Jimmy's next visions take them to the high school where another murder has occurred. Gloria actually goes to the scene in her lingerie. There, Gina, in a tight red party gown is in tears as her bestie was shotgunned by the killer. Now the cops begin suspecting Jimmy, but Gloria believes Jimmy and his visions. Uh oh...Jimmy sees the face of the killer in his visions and yells out his name.  Uh oh again, this film takes some sordid and taboo twists that you won't believe. Gloria will fit into a nice blue party gown that screams "I WANT SEX!"  The cops will re-focus their investigation.  Gina will be put in more peril.  Jimmy...well...you'll see.

Will Sandahl Bergman and Gina, all dolled up in tight party gowns and red high heels, engage in a vicious and erotic catfight over Jimmy?  Just who's face did Jimmy see in his vision as the killer?  Will Glenn Ford and/or Jan-Michael Vincent do anything in this film but grunt and sneer? This is a good one and the ending, or final reveal will be shocking. See "Raw Nerve" and enjoy the cheese provided by Traci Lords and Sandahl Bergman. 

Patient Killer, Victoria Pratt in a Bikini

We all saw "Kraken: Tentacles of the Deep" and drooled when the bikini clad marine biologist, played by Victoria Pratt, went on and on about squids.  Ms. Pratt has starred in many monster movies including "Mongolian Death Worm," and has always been very pleasing to the eye. Many of you remember her from the gratuitous TV show "Cleopatra 2525." So today, we have her in a film that is largely set in offices and more offices, so will we get Victoria Pratt in gratuitous bikini scenes?  YES!!! A sensual bath scene, some cleavage friendly beachwear, some smart but form fitting office wear, and more bikinis? Do bikinis advance the plot? Honestly, I don't understand that question. Let us look at the 2014 hypnotherapy thriller, "Patient Killer," directed by Casper Van Dien! Yep, that Casper Van Dien.

Eek! The film begins with a well dressed guy, Dylan (David Chokachi), committing suicide. Blows his own brains out. Relevant? Yes! See, he was the patient of Dr. Victoria Wrightmar (Pratt), a renown psychologist and hypnotist. Yep, she used hypnotherapy on Dylan even after her mentor Dr. Sylvan (Richard Burgi) warned her against it. Victoria felt bad about it but is in denial that hypnotherapy may be dangerous. She just wrote a book called Mental Control Food and is doing book signings. The book is about hypnotherapy and her success stories. Sure, this tome would sell better if it were called Slave Vixens of the Tentacled Beasts, but that would be gratuitous. Enter another patient, the obsessive compulsive Derek (Patrick Muldoon). Who can blame him, he falls in love with Victoria...though she doesn't with him. Victoria has a beau, Jason (Van Dien)...and he gets to paw her as she wears bikinis...lucky sap.

Uh oh...a mysterious new patient, the beautiful Blaire (Barbie Castro). She is not sleeping because of mysterious nightmares and Victoria hypnotizes her. Does she get better? Apparently. Now someone is terrorizing Victoria, bagging her office, stealing files, and busting into her luxury apartment. Derek becomes bolder and is fixated on conquering Victoria and making her his love slave. Blaire apparently is getting better.  Mental Control Food is selling well (though not as well as it would if it had my aforementioned title). So what's the problem? Derek, who had been getting better is now all psycho and Jason is pummeled nearly to death. Even worse the cops on the cases are centering their investigations on Victoria. More mysterious deaths occur.

Is Victoria coming unwound, and is she the real psycho here? How about Blaire, is she really getting better? Mental Control Food...seriously?  What lunatic thought up that title. Gratuitous and thrilling.  The mystery presents itself as everyone in the film is a suspect.  Fear not, there will not be a drought of scenes featuring Victoria Pratt in a bikini or demonstrating some impressive cleavage. See "Patient Killer," and just hope they change the title of this film to "Dr. Bikini and the Nympho-Psychos."