Devil's Dynamite, Hopping Vampires and a Sultry Vixen

From Taiwan we have a film that may be just too good for mankind. What happens when a sultry Taiwanese vixen clad in silk unleashes hopping vampires (Bram Stoker's original conception of his Dracula) on her enemies? You will find out in 1987's sequel to "Robo Vampire"... "Devil's Dynamite." Ah, so you didn't know this sequel existed... shame on you. Yep, a flood of vampires with their arms held out in front as they hop like bunny rabbits will surely horrify as the sultry Angela Mao, as queen of the underworld, controls them. Directed by Godfrey Ho, this is an epic that captures Taiwan's ethos better than any film ever made.

Okay, Mary (Mao) is the queen of Taiwanese organized crime. She got that way by betraying her boyfriend, Steve Cox, and having him sent away to jail. Now its 10 years later and Cox is out of jail and wants revenge on Mary who runs casinos and drug trafficking. Cox is angry that Mary took his place after betraying him and has a stash of gold hidden. Mary doesn't have the gold, though she wants it and Cox isn't telling her where it is. Cox sneaks into Mary's bedroom a lot to slap her around but can't bring himself to kill her.

Enough! Let's talk about some really neat elements of the plot. Mary has co-opted a Taoist monk and his vampire army. Now Mary sends these hopping vampires out to eliminate anyone who is a threat to her. Oh yes, Alex... a super warrior. He is clad in a tin foil suit with a silver helmet and battles the vampires. Alex finds another Taoist monk to equip him to kill all the vampires. A major battle is brewing. As the stunning Mary prepares to wipe out Steve Cox and his minions, Steve Cox prepares to invade Mary's wedding to a police inspector, and Alex the tin foil spaceman heads out to do a final battle with the hopping vampires.

Got it? The story of a generation complete with great dubbing and Kung Fu. Angela Mao is one of the most sultry actresses you will ever see and the camera captures her nicely. Will the sultry Mary survive Steve Cox' wrath and have a successful wedding? Will the hopping vampires tear apart Alex, the tin foil spaceman? Will mainland China finally leave Taiwan alone once they understand what this movie is trying to say? "Devil's Dynamite" has something for all of us and we can all learn important life lessons from the plot. The hopping vampires are such an obvious metaphor we wonder why only the Robo Vampire films have utilized them.