Wednesday, March 25, 2020

Cell Count, Quarantine and Icky Creatures

Laura Duyn, an actress, half Thai and half Dutch, is a lovely lady who plays a stewardess (IMDB lists her as a stewardess in the credits) in 2012's "Cell Count." Wait! She's not really a stewardess here, she's actually...well...you'll see. This is a good one...a medical horror story that gets quite gory pretty quickly. Perhaps a love story, or an erotic fantasy, but definitely not the feel good film of 2012, this movie has everything. Oh yes...and then there is the stewardess lady...is she even real? You'll see...but you'll have to watch the film as I will refrain from spoilers regarding our half Asian stewardess.
The formerly lovely Sadie (Haley Talbot) is dying from an awful disease and her hunk husband Russell (Robert McKeehen) watches on helplessly. But wait! A cure? Dr. Brandt (Christopher Toyne), who looks as if he is right out of a Nazi death camp clinic, makes the sad couple a deal of a lifetime. Apparently he has a cure, still in its experimental stages, with minor side effects. All the lovebirds have to do is agree...they do. The three are whisked off to a secret U.S. government facility. Fast forward three weeks and Sadie is beautiful again, and apparently disease free. Also at the facility are other patients cured of the illness. Uh oh...only Sadie and Russell are happy, the others, who have been there longer, are not as joyful. Also not as joyful are a couple of murderers in holding cells who have also volunteered for "the cure."
"The Cure"? Ha...its...well, you'll see it. Dr. Brandt assures his test subjects all is going well. Ick! subject Mary (Adrienne Vogel) manifests an ugly side effect. Now Russell is getting sick, as Sadie only improves. Now we get a glimpse of the cure and it is monstrous. Now the test subjects are eager to get the cure out of their bodies...before it finds its own way out. Now the test subjects plot rebellion and our stewardess-like babe forms an attachment to one of those subjects. What follows? Icky creatures, machine-gun battles, and carnage...gory carnage. Then the epic and ambitious ending that only invites a graphic novel series to be created.
Will Russell and Sadie be able to go home and start a family? What is "the cure" and what does it look like? Exactly what is this governmental scientific facility and is there any escape from it? This is an icky one and the ending is all encompassing and ominous. For an icky (there's that word again) movie watching experience, which includes the lovely Laura Duyn, see "Cell Count," directed by Todd E. Freeman.

3 comments:

  1. It's got all the ingredients of corona virus, except this movie is real, great review, what do we really have to worry about?

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  2. Not sure where you find these but bravo!!!

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  3. Nice review. I'm going to find this film now.

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