The Last Hail M.A.R.Y, Space-Bimbos Save the World

Save the world? Ha! They try, but the bimbos, like anything in history, need a man to arrive to really save things. Still, if the astronettes are sultry...well...that's all we can ask for. As the Artemis program proves to be the country's largest jobs program and still has not put anyone on the moon, the space program needs a boost. Perhaps babes in space is the way to go. At least, we like looking at them. Our feature today, from our buddies at The Asylum, is 2026's "The Last Hail M.A.R.Y.," directed by Marc Gottlieb.

Okay, the great war against Mars is over, finally. An uneasy truce exists. Sadly, an even greater nemesis for Earth emerges. The sun's core is dying causing the star to expand. It expands so far that the sun engulfs Mercury. Sad! Now it threatens Venus...and after Venus? Yep...us! The ISS, no not that one, the Interplanetary Space Station, manned with babes, is tasked with saving the solar system. The commander is Lorraine (Esmeree Sterling). She's an idiot and in her own incompetence may destroy the ISS and Earth without the sun's help. Still, she is real cute and wears her lip gloss well, so we like her. She yells at everyone but in all fairness, her crew all yell back. The Mission Specialist is the babe redhead Solange (Juliette Cecile). She's grouchy and is pals with Hinata (Lei Kiryu), who cries a lot. Okay, there are others but we like Truman (Mica Javier) the best...total babe. Sadly, Truman dies horribly and is gone early in the film.

The sun swallows Venus sooner than expected and Earth is only hours away. Lorraine is clueless and keeps yelling at the other babes. Along comes a Martian, Icluf (Brennen Amonett). He arrives in his spaceship claiming he knows how to stop the sun from expanding and how to save Earth. Problem is no Earthling trusts a Martian and Lorraine is content to screw things up all by herself. Finally, the Martian wins their trust, sort of, and now that a man is on board the ISS, there is a chance the Earth just may be saved. We still miss Truman...but the beautiful die way too early in space. Now Earthlings and Martians must work together to save Earth, and consequently, Mars too, 'cause they are next. Yes, there are a couple of men in this film, other than Icluf, but they are neutered by the domineering babes. 

Hey, they brought Spock back...maybe Truman will be resurrected for the sequel...we can only hope. Divorced guys, who have been savaged by babes, will understand this film. Our boys at The Asylum have given us a fun one that only rates a 2.8 out of 10 on IMDB's rating scale. Will grouchy Lorraine be able to make just one half of a competent move during her command in this apocalyptic event?  Will Icluf run from the station and try to find some more men to work with?  Is this a film where we all will be cheering for the sun to explode? Have some fun in your next movie watching experience and see "The Last Hail M.A.R.Y."