Ring Ring, Telemarketer Carnage

Idiots!  Telemarketers!  The bane of our existence, at times.  Wait...I need to renew my auto warranty.  Okay, I'm back. What happens when telemarketers behave badly and do stupid things?  Well, the answer is told to us in our film today.  It'll be a gory mess, actually. I do have to admit, our telemarketer protagonists are likable, if not stupid.  We do pull for them.  Nail guns, captivity, and burnt frozen pizzas be damned, our feature today is 2019's "Ring Ring," directed by Adam Marino.

Okay, the Incredible Hulk lays off his staff at the phone bank for telemarketers.  No, really.  Lou Ferrigno lays them all off and reminds someone that they would not like him when he's angry.  Amber (Kirby Bliss Blanton) and Will (Malcolm Goodwin) can't afford to lose their jobs.  Uh oh...Will has a plan.  Steal the company's phone lists, and go into business for himself. Amber buys off on this idea and the duo steal the client lists. After Will is seduced by redheaded babe, Amanda (Emily Tyra), he loses his phone, which has all the lists on it.  Now Amber and him have to retrace his steps and find it.  An app is activated and the duo call for a ride from an Uber type service.  The ride arrives and is driven by junkie, maniac, serial killer Jacob (Tommy Kijas)...who coincidentally has their phone.

Let's not dwell on coincidence. Now Jacob has Will and Amber locked in the basement of his big old house. Actually it is his mom's house.  She is dead and in the freezer while he lives off her social security checks. Now Will and Amber try to escape.  Jacob is armed with a nail gun.  Amber tries yelling at Jacob, reasoning with him, and seducing him.  Strung out on heroin, Jacob is non-responsive to Amber's sex appeal.  As the film progresses, Jacob realizes he has to murder his two captives and also gets more wasted.

Do Amber and Will have a shot at escape?  Is Jacob's auto-warranty still current or does it need to be renewed?  Do all telemarketers deserve a similar fate?  This is a good one.  Mr. Marino gives us two protagonists who we should despise...but we like them.  Will and Amber come across as cute and naive, though stupid and cunning, too.  See "Ring Ring" and think twice about yelling profanity at the next guy trying to extend your auto-warranty.