Strip Club Slasher, Bloody Prurience

Filmed like an early 1970s drive-in movie, this nostalgic piece will leave you needing a shower.  Dirty, grimy, gory, and without any morally redeeming qualities, this stripper heavy drama will probably leave you gasping at the uber-prurient and twisted ending. Here's the best part!  This film stars one of this blog's favorite actresses...Sarah French! Our feature today is 2010's "Strip Club Slasher," directed by Jason Stephenson.

After a bad night stripping at a dive strip club, Kitty (Elske McCain) is murdered by a weird guy who intercepts her in the parking lot. So distraught...okay, not very distraught...the other strippers at the club will convene at Desiree's (Rachel Grubb) house for remembrance.  In reality, only the sultry Sarah (French) has mourning type feelings for Kitty. The other strippers are indifferent to the poor babe's fate. Desiree actually invited all the strippers over so she could get into Sarah's pants. This is a shock to Desiree's stripper GF Jezzy (Saint Deville). Jezzy's twin sister, Heidi (also Deville), is Sarah's good friend and gets stoned immediately. Now distraught as Desiree chases Sarah into the bathroom, Jezzy storms out only to meet a tortuous fate at the hands of the killer.

Now the killer has descended on the house and he is a hulking being. He'll also follow all the strippers back to the club when they return there to talk to the investigating detective (Joel D. Wynkoop). The killer has a big machete and he'll use it to decapitate and slice throats.  The gals fall faster than a prom dress at an after party, but Sarah has what it takes to be the final girl...or does she?  Desiree is excited when Sarah recounts to her a memory of her first lesbian encounter with Mindy Muffin (Leah Avery). Sadly for Desiree, Sarah is not interested in her.  What happened to Mindy Muffin?  Unknown. Now the masked behemoth enters the club and begins swinging away with his machete.

Will Sarah be the final girl or is there something twisted planned for her by these warped movie makers?  Will Desiree get to bring Sarah to ecstasy, or will Sarah maintain high standards?  Just who is this masked killer, and could it be Mindy Muffin returning to share some glory with Sarah? The ending will be as twisted, or more, than the first 70 minutes of this film.  For an epic performance by Sarah French, in a bloody and prurient slasher film, see "Strip Club Slasher."  

Blood Mountain Massacre, Homage to Drive-In Splatter Fests

There's a lot here, and none of it is good.  I mean, so bad its good.  If you like those Satan exploitation films that showed up on drive-in screens in the late 60s and early 70s, then this is the film for you.  Though this is a 2024 film, it is filmed like an old drive-in offering.  The plot is right out of so many films you saw in the 70s and 80s, but that is a lot better than out of a Stanley Kubrick or Francois Truffaut film...or better than that "Star Wars" Mandalorian nonsense.  Babes in peril!  Machetes!  Escapee from an insane asylum!  Gratuitous shower scenes! No, not the remake for "To Kill a Mockingbird," but "Blood Mountain Massacre," directed by Bob Place.

There is a plot, but be wise and don't pay too much attention to it lest you miss gratuitous shower scenes or splattering blood. A total lunatic escapes from a prison van bound for an asylum for the criminally insane. Edward (Jody Black) kills a babe juggler by shoving a curling iron through her eyeball. Dr. Loomis (Greg Behrens) arrives and tells the cops his patient is a true murder machine ...think Jason. Okay, now we meet the stars of this epic, an all-girl punk rock band called The Abortions. A rough crew of babes featuring Laurie (K.D. O'Hair) a heroin addict, Nancy (Katherine Blackford) a blonde Tarot card reader, Alice (Liz Derr) a nymphomaniac who likes it rough, Pam (Vandala Morton) a Pam Greer wannabe. Also along is the clean cut sister of Laurie, Sally (Jenna Aungst) who sells the merch at concerts and drives the van.

As Edward murders his way on his trek to Blood Mountain, The Abortions join the lead band Dick Hammer for an after-party at their lead singer, Freddie's (Matt Maher) blood mountain cabin. A veritable drug filled orgy develops with shower scenes and hot tub deviance. Then Edward arrives...and you can guess where the plot goes...or can you?  Director Bob Place has a surprise or three for us and what follows is one of the most ambitious plots you will ever see.  Worry not, the plot won't become clean cut but this film becomes much more than a slasher horror film.

Yes, I have left out a lot, you'll see.  Will the all-girl punk rock band make it to the end of the film intact?  Will Sally maintain her virginity as the end credits roll?  With bands called Dick Hammer and The Abortions, can you figure out where a lot of this plot will go?  This is a prurient and decadent traipse through a slasher/satanist film that would have played well in the drive-ins over 50 years ago.  Today we look upon it with nostalgia and guilty pleasure.  See "Blood Mountain Massacre" and then take a good long hot shower afterwards to clean off all the dirt you will feel.

Death Streamer, Vampire Eats His Subscribers

Yes!  We have a Charles Band film today. The genius produced and directed this Full Moon Features effort. So given this is a Full Moon film, are we likely to see female nudity in the gratuitous sense? Yep!  Add spurting blood to that topless motif and we have something that we may be able to classify as prurient.  Oh, and how the blood does spurt!  Our feature today is 2024's "Death Streamer."

Arturo (Sean Ohlman) is a handsome vampire that invites big breasted babes to his mansion.  With the help of his topless bartender (Chili Jean) and thug servant (Travis Stoner), he drugs babes in sexy party gowns, lays them on a bed, and eats their necks. Oh, even better!  He livestreams all this for his million subscribers. Discretion is not one of his strong points. On the other side of town, Alex (Aaron Michael McDavid), Edwina (Emma Massalone), and Juniper (Kaitlin Moore) have their own livestream, a YouTube show called Church of Chills that explores occult phenomena and ghosts. The trio are struggling to gain enough subscribers to make their show profitable, but appear to be fighting a losing battle.  Then by accident, Juniper comes across Arturo's bloody livestream and the trio figure out his murders are real.  Now Alex has an idea.

Arturo is smart and figures out that Juniper has hacked into his stream.  Now Arturo comes through the livestream and threatens Alex, Edwina, and Juniper...they should have heeded the warnings. Alex, smelling subscribers, decides to play one of Arturo's murders on Church of Chills. Not a good idea as Arturo decides the intrusive trio is going to be a problem and he comes after them.  Trying to defend themselves, Edwina does research and realizes Arturo's real age and what his ultimate plan is, and it is terrifying.  Now the two babes are in mortal danger of being the next sacrifice as Alex constructs wooden crosses to defend themselves.

Do Alex, Edwina, and Juniper have a prayer at defending themselves from a toothy and aroused vampire who likes dames with great big...smiles?  Will Juniper or Edwina capture Arturo's eye and be his next sacrifice?  Will Alex' wooden crosses and his knowledge of the occult be enough to mount a defense against Arturo and his minions?  This is a bloody, prurient, and graphic film from our buddies at Full Moon.  Kids, if your mom says 'no way are you watching a Full Moon Features movie,' obey them.  For a bloody good time, and especially for fans of Charles Band, see "Death Streamer."

Hunting Emma, A Pacifist Goes Nuclear

In 1897, Sigmund Freud was quoted as saying, "Inside every pacifist is a raging nymphomaniac psychopath thirsting to gut any brute that comes her way." Okay, I admit this is a paraphrase. Still, you've seen this trope...and anti-violence, anti-gun, anti-war puke is pushed to the limit and he or she becomes Predator! Today we have one from South Africa, 2017's "Hunting Emma," directed by Byron Davis.

Emma (Leandie du Randt) is a sultry blonde schoolteacher who is a pacifist, supposedly. On her holiday, she drives to visit her dad (Tertius Meintjes) and breaks down on a deserted highway.  Unlucky for her she spots six men who might be able to help.  Too late, as she nears them, the gang of six criminals executes a police officer.  Emma, horrified, runs.  The gang leader, Bosman (Neels van Jaarsveld) orders his men to capture her...they do.  Bosman then orders Boela (Edwin van der Walt) to rape her...he tries.  Dad finds out Emma is stranded and in the wilderness.  He puts two and two together and sees that a gang of six is hunting her...and he is scared...for the six men.  See, dad was a special forces monster who taught Emma all he knew...especially how to murder. In handcuffs, Emma escapes as Boela is distracted...the chase is on again.  Emma is smart and triples back on her tracks causing the men to separate.

Boella and AJ (Danie Putter) find her first...to their detriment. Boella ends up gutted and AJ ends up... educated.  Now Bosman is ticked!  The men keep pursuing, Emma keeps slaughtering.  Now Emma has one of their radios and calls Bosman a "b@#$h."  Bosman has an ego and three men left.  Well, you can guess how the rest of the plot goes.  Oh, I should say Emma just broke up with her BF because he slugged a guy in a bar.  This fact will make the ending of this film priceless...you'll see.

Will Emma murder her way all the way to Bosman and then skewer him?  Will Emma's dad camp out in the wilderness with popcorn, marshmallows, and beer and just wait for his bloodstained daughter to arrive?  Will Emma see the error of her ways and take her BF back?  The goons in this film are evil, and Emma is quite the babe as she sweats nicely in the South African desert.  For a vicious babe versus brutes film, see "Hunting Emma." 

The Arkansas Pigman Massacre, Little Girls and a Hatchet Wielding Pig

A coming of age film!  yep, if the homicidal half man-half pig were a cello instead and this film was called "Two Girls and a Cello," the critics would all love it. Yep, it would get an 8.8/10 rating on IMDB instead of the 2.9 it does get. Something about a behemoth of a man with a pig's head scares the critics...wusses! Hey, Eric Roberts is in this...we like Eric Roberts, and even though his 90 second scene has no bearing on the plot, we do admire his...hair. But wait!  You'll never guess!  This is actually a pretty good film. Our feature today is 2025's "The Arkansas Pigman Massacre," directed by JT Kris.

Pig Man is the behemoth hunk who has a pig head, wears a bloody apron, and wields a hatchet and carving knife. He chases down hikers and campers, cuts them open, and feasts on their internal organs.  The monster man oinks a lot and is relentless.  As the film opens, we see him hunt a few down. So here are our two stars, a couple of 12-year-old girls who are into their phones, music, and boys. Tracey (Junie Liv Thomasson) is from a broken family and would rather live with her dad (Roberts) than her mom. Chelsea (Saga Pernille Johnson Muro) is her buddy. Tracey has a crush on Chelsea's rock-star brother, Dylan (Dante B. Salazar). Dylan is driving the two pre-teens to summer camp when the car stalls on a back dirt road...and along comes Pig Man. Pig Man takes Dylan away and Tracey and Chelsea flee into the woods.

Now our two slightly annoying, but kind of likable pre-dames are on the run.  Pig Man wants them to eat for dinner.  The girls are horrified, exhausted, and helpless to defend themselves against the raging monster with the hatchet.  Pig Man eats Dylan and now the gals have no hope for rescue.  Several close calls occur, but the screeching duo always just get away.  Along the way, Pig Man sometimes veers off and murders and eats more campers.  No problem here, the monster always gets right back on the trail.  Now the gals are desperate and their bond of friendship may be their biggest weapon against Pig Man, an obvious metaphor for modern American media and culture and their effort to destroy femininity in our young girls.

Will Tracey and Chelsea defeat the ruination that awaits them and turn the tables on Pig Man?  Will Eric Roberts do anything of note in this 90-minute epic?  Is the fact that this film took place in Arkansas an obvious message of and metaphor for the perversion and ruination that Bill and Hillary Clinton caused a nation?  Better than any "Mandalorian" garbage, and infinitely more valuable to our social conscience than the over-rated "To Kill a Mockingbird," "The Arkansas Pigman Massacre" is a film you must put on your watch-list.

Bad Channels, A Shrunken MTV Generation

What a combo!  Charles Band and Full Moon Entertainment merged with MTV. Yep, we have it here today and it even stars the perky Martha Quinn!  I believe she is an MTV original. When MTV still did music videos, boy that was long ago, their allure, especially with teens, was at its maximum. Now, MTV is gone, at least from any kind of popularity. Did MTV turn our kids into mind-numbed robots? Well, according to this film...maybe. Our feature today is 1992's "Bad Channels," directed by Ted Nicolaou.

Superstation 66 is the biggest rock station in the country. DJ Dan O'Dare (Paul Hipp) is kicking the programming off and it is being covered by TV reporterette Lisa (Quinn). Uh, oh! UFOs and one lands near the station. A slimy alien comes to the station with his laser shooting robot and takes it over. The station is covered in green slime so no one gets in or out. Dan is forced to broadcast and his music entrances the sultriest dames in Pahoota to dirty dance.  Even worse, as the babes dance, the slimy alien zaps them into glass jars at the station and shrinks them to a foot tall.  Now the beautiful high school band babe Bunny (Daryl Strauss), the beautiful diner waitress Cookie (Charlie Spradling), and sultry and kinky Nurse Ginger (Melissa Behr) are captured in these jars...but one more needs to be filled.

Outside the station, many of the town's citizens are overtaken by a green fungus that grows when the music from the station is broadcast.  Inside the studio, Dan tries everything to fight the monster alien and the laser-shooting robot and also tries to rescue the shrunken babes.  Lisa heroically keeps covering the story for her station as the cops and locals converge on the station and its radio tower.  The music blasts and each babe is entranced by a separate MTV-type band. Guitars play aplenty, lead singers gyrate like crazy, and babes are spun into sexual frenzies.

What does the slimy green alien want with the babes it has captured and put into jars?  Who is destined to be put in the fourth jar?  Will Lisa earn her Emmy for this heroic reporting, or will she be sucked in by the radio frequency, shrunk, and be put into that last jar? The cheese factor is terrific and the music factor is...well, if you liked MTV, you'll like these tunes.  See "Bad Channels" and relive the days MTV dominated the psyche of high schoolers throughout the world.

Adam & Evil, Teens in Wilderness Shredded

Erica Cerra is a lovely actress we never saw enough of.  She was the sultry deputy in the Syfy show "Eureka," and had a voice that oozed seduction...and wore her uniform well. She's in this slasher epic, and no uniform, just some shorts and at times a bikini. What we have here is sort of a rip-off of "Friday the 13th," not in backstory, but of sultry teens felled by a machete, arrows, a sickle, or other blunt instruments.  Before the bikini babes and hunks assume room temperature, there will be a lot of steamy pre-marital sex, beer drinking, and more steamy carnal relations. Our feature today is 2004's "Adam & Evil," directed by Andrew Van Slee.

Four years ago Adam (Sean Arnfinson) and Matt (Brody Harms) set off a Roman candle that shot into a house by accident and incinerated a nice family. Accident, but the two now have a bloody secret. These two will join six others in a wilderness getaway as they have just graduated from high school. Yvette (Lynsey Brothers) is Adam's GF and she knows about the dirty deed. Also along are the hunk Rob (Terrence William) and Rachel (Tiffany Paterson).  This couple is so sweet and Rachel in a bikini is unbelievable...they'll both be impaled through the neck by the same arrow, so sweet. Yep...the killings start fairly quickly. Oh, Seth (Kevin Robson) is sliced in his tent after boinking the lovely Maureen (Allison Warnyca). Maureen is the sheriff's (Jodie Graham) wife and he is a jealous sort...a killer?

The teens start being sliced and impaled at a rapid rate.  Suspects? Well, Yvonne (Cerra) just dumped her psycho BF Shane (James Clayton) and he followed the group to the wilderness with evil intentions.  Too easy?  There is the obligatory creepy caretaker (Jeffrey Fisher) with the hedge clippers.  Oh, Evelyn!  The most seductive of them all, also looks great in a bikini, and is loose with the pre-marital sex.  Why is she a suspect?  You'll see.  Booby traps, arrows, and machetes will fly and blood will spatter.  Babes will die horribly and so will hunks.  The killer goes through these great looking teens like crap through a goose.  Then!  Guess what!  A nice surprise ending and a final reveal that will be so satisfying.

Will Erica Cerra make it to the end credits or will she enjoy a dramatic death scene?  Will there be bikini-babe catfights?  Will Adam and Matt finally face retribution for that horrible Roman candle accident four years ago?  The cheese and beef is the highlight of this film but the kills are numerous and great.  For a throwback to the 1980s Slasher Era, see "Adam & Evil."  

Rag Doll, Slasher Raggedy Ann

We have a grim one, today.  No humor, wit, or relief from a bloody ominous horror with a big knife.  Our villain today is an oversized Raggedy Ann doll, named Emily (Junior Wunna). The doll has quite the history and a big knife.  Don't get too attached to anyone in this film no matter how big their...er, their smiles are.  Our feature today is the Chrissie Wunna spectacular, 2023's "Rag Doll," directed by Ben Ivory.

As our film begins the six-foot-tall rag doll, with its big knife, slashes two sultry sisters.  Happens.  Fast forward, Chia (Chrissie Wunna) and her lesbian lover Monica (Danielle Scott) are moving into a country house with Chia's daughter Crystal (Ruby Wunna).  Both Monica and Chia have great big...smiles and will have a pre-marital sex scene later and will swap a lot of spit.  This is not okay with Crystal who is angry her mom decided she played for the other team and left her dad, Dom (Benjamin Schnau). A really ripped up rag doll is found, the same one that leveled the sultry sisters, and Crystal decides she likes it. The doll is Crystal's only friend and Crystal is very hostile to the sultry Monica. The lesbians have a dinner party and invite a gay couple, Jonny (Connor Powles) and Rob (Scott McGlynn). Crystal is hostile to all of them because these alternative lifestyles have ruined her family life.

The rag doll comes to life and begins murdering anyone who has anything to do with this film. The gay couple will not fare well and either will...well, you'll see.  Recognizing the assets of Monica and Chia, the movie maker dresses them up in some party gowns you will not believe!  Crystal continues to be unhappy and the rag doll gets more bloodthirsty.  We're filled in on the backstory and it is a grotesque one.  Unfortunately for Monica and Chia, the psycho-doll has no fondness for alternate lifestyles.

Just how did the knife-wielding rag doll come about?  Will the lesbian couple with the great big...smiles, have a chance against the maniacal Raggedy Ann thing that stalks their house?  Will Crystal's attachment to her new companion lead to issues with her mom?  The cast is fantastic and great looking.  The doll is menacing and the knife is big.  For a neat slasher film, see "Rag Doll," and enjoy all that Chrissie Wunna has to offer.

 

Equalizer 2000, Post-Apocalyptic Fun

Okay, if we are going to have a post-apocalyptic film from the 80s, we should also have a babe dressed in leather who fires a lot of big guns. Check. Many will remember Corinne Wahl nee Alphen.  Currently the former Playmate works as a professional Tarot card reader. Don't judge...what are you doing to make a buck? In this one she will match up with a sweaty brute, fire a lot of guns, have pre-marital sex, be tied up and bound, and fall in love...a true post-apocalyptic siren.  Our feature today is 1987's "Equalizer 2000," directed by Cirio H. Santiago. 

Slade (Richard Norton) has muscles, sweats a lot, and grunts. While fighting the evil rulers of the post-apocalyptic wasteland, The Ownership, his dad is killed by an Ownership general named Lawton (William Steis). Now the free agent Slade is on the run, trying to avoid The Ownership and a myriad of rebel groups. The Ownership traipses the wasteland looking for resources and oil.  They also murder anyone who may be a rebel.  Slade is taken prisoner by Dixon's (Rex Cutter) rebels as they think he is an Ownership thug.  Soon, Dixon's best fighter, Karen (Wahl) befriends Slade.  Gaining the trust of Dixon's rebels, and also the affections of the sweaty babe clad in leather, Slade builds a mega-gun that shoots everything including missiles.  With this gun, Slade repels Lawton and his forces.  Now Lawton wants the gun.

Slade and Karen have pre-marital sex and are eventually captured. Slade will get away but Lawton will end up wit the big gun. Karen will also escape and now all the rebel groups will unite on a last ditch effort to destroy the rule of The Ownership.  Slade also converges on the fort of The Ownership but only to murder Lawton.  Lawton possesses Slade's gun and it is the great equalizer.  Clad in leather and looking better than any Tarot card reader has a right to, Karen leads a raid inside The Ownership's fort. Slade is a bit slow but grunting and sweating he also arrives.  A mega-war breaks out.  Flamethrowers, rocket launchers, bows and arrows, spears, and those neat souped up cars from the "Mad Max" movies!  So beautiful.

Will Lawton recapture Karen and use his big gun on her?  Will Slade decide to help the rebels destroy The Ownership?  Will Karen and Slade swap any more spit and other bodily fluids in a dark tunnel emanating the scents of sweat and Chanel No. 5?  This is an epic one which is heavy on battle scenes.  If you need to watch a man's movie, avoid the current box office and see "Equalizer 2000" and then go have your cards read.

Two on a Guillotine, Nubile Blonde Babe in Peril

Connie Stevens! Dean Jones! Cesar Romero!  A cute Disney flick? No! A twisted and taboo tale that will make you squirm.  Heads will roll, the beautiful will be...well, you'll see, but it will be yucky.  Betrayal, deceit, murder, and madness await this cast which is more suited for a family prime-time drama. Our feature today is 1965's "Two on a Guillotine," directed by William Conrad. 

20 years ago The Great Duquesne (Romero) was this country's finest magician.  He always had cutting edge and bloody tricks that made audiences gasp.  They were just tricks, though.  His beautiful assistant was his wife Melinda (Stevens). She'd be bloodied and impaled but always reappeared whole after the trick. Uh oh...something is wrong...but what? Melinda seems fed up and bordering on a breakdown as her two-year old seems more attached to the babysitter, Dolly (Virginia Gregg). Then poof! 20 years later. That two-year old is now 22 and the sultry Cassie (also Stevens).  She arrives back in town just before the funeral of her dad. She had not seen him for 20 years after...after...after what? Now there he is in a coffin with windows and a weird will. The will?  Cassie gets everything if she stays in his mansion for 7 days without being scared away...easy, right?

Enter Val (Jones).  He's cute and pushy.  A reporter who is also wondering about the aforementioned questions.  Even better, in the will, The Great Duquesne promised to come back from the dead. Lying to Cassie, in order to get a story, Val says he's in real estate.  After a horrific first five-minutes in the mansion, Val rushes in and saves Cassie and now she is sweet on him.  Cassie, believing Val is in real estate, tells him all she knows about her dad but this just creates more questions. Oh, the locked room.  There is a room at the top of the stairs that they have no key for. Strange screams, moans and flying skeletons play on Cassie's nerves.  Val, at first, only wanted a story and used deception, now falls in love with Cassie.  Uh oh, if Cassie finds out he is a reporter, he'll be thrown out. Then the mystery of what happened to Melinda.  Cassie is a spitting image of her mom and no one knows where she went...though her harp playing often can be heard through the mansion. 

Enough of the plot.  The mansion is cavernous and spooky.  Cassie is nubile and prone to scares.  Val is quite taken by the blonde.  What happened to Melinda?  Will The Great Duquesne come back from the grave?  Will Val ever level with Cassie and properly allow her to fall in love with him?  Startling and unnerving, the final reveal eventually arrives and is frightening and heartbreaking. Forego any Disney garbage and see a real shocker, "Two on a Guillotine."

   

Crisis Point, Rhona Mitra Hostage Negotiator

Rhona Mitra as a vampire!  Rhona Mitra as an assassin!  Rhona Mitra as a monster hunter!  So, why not Rhona Mitra as a hostage negotiator?  I know, hostage negotiators usually don't wear black leather catsuits, except in North Korea, but Rhona Mitra in anything will do. Today we have a crime thriller in which the bad guys will have to deal with the sultriest voice ever to be on the other end of the telephone. Our feature today is 2012's "Crisis Point," directed by Adrian Willis.

No one is perfect.  Still, if you have to be imperfect, you may has well have the perfect body, hence Cameron Grainger (Mitra) is called to a hostage stand-off in Detroit. A 16-year old liquor store robber (Zack Paledeau) has a gun and bad robbing skills, thus a stand-off.  He'll soon talk to Cameron on the telephone, lucky kid.  A half dozen lives are at stake.  Uh oh...a horrible mistake occurs and the negotiation goes bad. Now Cameron leaves the force and her teaching position at  the college. The good news is hunk detective Liam (Marc Menard) can now date her. Cameron is not ready to date yet, but we know she's interested. Cameron needs time  off to assess if she has lost what it takes to be a great hostage negotiator. Time off? Ha! Two robbers enter a bank and now a botched getaway lead to another hostage standoff.

Do the cops call in all-star negotiator Cameron, even though she is on leave? No! The bad guys call her in!  Why? Here is the rub...the sultry back manager is Darcy (Erika Rosenbaum)...Cameron's sister.  Coincidence? Hardly!  We should also point out that this bank has the sultriest bank teller ever put on film, the lovely Tanya (Jordan Hayes). Seems the lead bank robber (Elias Toufexis) is not interested in robbing the bank...he is interested in revenge. See, and this twist can be seen a mile away, this bank robber is the older brother of the deceased 16-year old from the botched negotiation at the start of this film. Now Cameron soon finds out she is not dealing with a bank robber, but the bloodthirsty brother of the kid he thinks Cameron killed. Cameron better work fast as the robber has plans for Erika...and the other bank robber has plans for the sultry Tanya.  

Will Cameron be able to put together a successful negotiation after the deadly one earlier in this film? Will Erika escape the wrath of the man who believes his brother was killed by Cameron?  Will the lovely Tanya be able to repel the dirty advances of the other bank robber? Rhona Mitra is terrific and her voice could bring Putin and Zelensky to a ceasefire.  Perhaps no surprises but a terrific crime thriller anyway with a nice cheese and beef factor.  See "Crisis Point" and enjoy a seductive effort by one of our favorite actresses.   

Dollman, A 13-Inch Cop

As the 80s melded into the 90s, Full Moon Entertainment became king of straight-to-video releases.  A number of franchise plot devices and characters were created.  Charles Band knew what he was doing and Blockbuster made a fortune in rental sales because of him.  Little people (no, not midgets) and little creatures were favorites of audiences with some nice cheese and sexual situations added in.  Today we will look at 1991's "Dollman," directed by Albert Pyun.

On the Planet Arturos, a "Dirty Harry" like cop is suspended for brutality.  Brick Bardo (Tim Thomerson) shoots first and asks questions later.  After his latest feat, the suspended cop is captured by an old nemesis, Sprug (Frank Collison). Sprug is a detached head that flies around on a small flying saucer and has in his possession a bomb that can blow up the entire planet. Brick murders Sprug's henchmen and chases the head. Both beings climb aboard spaceships and end up crash landing on Earth. Now the 13-inch detective is at a disadvantage...size wise. Being the cop he is, Brick saves the lovely Debi (Kamala Lopez) from violation from a drug gang lead by Braxton (Jackie Earle Haley).  Retreating from the murderous cop, the gang finds Sprug and brings him with them. Now Debi takes Brick home and Sprug buys Braxton's help with the promise of a bomb that can destroy all of New York City.

Sprug wants revenge on Brick, who is responsible for shooting off all his limbs.  Brick tries to help Debi clean up her neighborhood and murders a lot of drug thugs. Now Braxton sends his gang after Brick, but Brick, even at his small size, wipes them out.  Now Braxton gets smart and grabs Debi, luring Brick to his hideout.  Ultimately, Braxton plans to destroy New York with his new fusion bomb.  The small cop with a potent gun shies away from no villain, and his sense of chivalry draws him into the ambush in order to save the noble damsel.

Will the unification of Braxton and Sprug spell the annihilation of the Big Apple?  Will the little cop with a big heart be able to save Debi?  Even if the the 13-inch cop saves the normal sized babe, can they actually do anything to celebrate?  This is a good one filled with wit, gore, violence, and a lot of shoot-outs.  See "Dollman" and be ready for a ton of spin-offs and sequels.

Night of the Bloody Transplant, Organ Carnage

The brilliance of man, in the 60s and 70s, gave us space exploration and organ transplant.  The U.S. and Soviets were landing men on the moon and visiting planets.  Doctors were on the verge of perfecting heart transplants.  NASA and the medical profession then took another direction.  NASA focused on irrelevant causes like the global warming hoax and the medical profession got all hot and bothered about cholesterol.  Mad scientists were replaced by federal grant happy dorks with medical degrees.  Today's feature harps back to the day when heart transplants still had us awe inspired, 1970's "Night of the Bloody Transplant," directed by David W. Hanson.

Dr. Jim Arnold (Cal Seely) is frustrated.  He can't get the medical profession to listen to him.  They think he's a quack. Jim says he can perfect heart transplants.  He's way ahead of his time.  Jim has a patient, Mrs. Woodruff, an old lady who is happy to fund him.  His nurse, Beth (Elizabeth Rawlings), believes in him.  So does his thug/prize fighting brother, Tom (Dick Grimm). Tom has a problem with women...they reject him and he murders them.  The good news, after Tom murders a party girl, Jim now has a heart to transplant into Mrs. Woodruff.

The surgery goes well...for Mrs. Woodruff...not the lady Tom pummeled to death.  Now the police are involved.  Paul (David Haller), a detective, is hot on the clues.  He follows the trail of murdered gals, who just happen to be missing their hearts.  Tom becomes more unstable when another party girl blackmails him.  Beth believes the well oiled machine of her and Jim would run a lot better without the brute Tom.  More murders and more police scrutiny lead to Jim and Beth having to get more creative and also put them in major peril.

Drive-in quality all the way, there will be enough gore and cheese to satisfy.  Has the Fauci-ization of the U.S. healthcare industry destroyed the possibility of ever perfecting heart transplants? Are stupid and fictitious vaccines the main thrust of U.S. medicine now that Big Pharma rules the day?  Does pretty Nurse Beth stand a chance at surviving this film with a mad scientist and prize fighting thug surrounding her?  For some good 1970s drive-in madness, see "Night of the Bloody Transplant."

Death Dancers, BDSM Madam's Plot for Revenge

Today we have the magnum opus of Deborah Dutch! Many of you know the name. Those of you who don't...well, trust me...she is talented and apparently big in South Korea...as is Anthony Zerbe. BDSM out the Ying Yang! You will get your film dose of it with this film thanks to an all-in performance by Ms. Dutch.  Sick of watching bore-athons like "Shadowlands" and "Barry Lyndon"? You owe it to yourself to view this anthem from the BDSM world of deviance and carnal bacchanalia. Our feature today is 1993's "Death Dancers," directed by Jason Holt.

Shannon (Dutch) gets pregnant and her BDSM husband is not pleased. He beats the snot out of her causing a miscarriage. What does she do? Watch the film. A serial killer is murdering men who attend BDSM nightclubs.  Not nearly as deviant as the peeps on The Epstein List. Shannon is the #1 BDSM peep and charges top dollar to humiliate you, tie you up, make you beg, whip you, and lick her feet. Sure, she is a metaphor for our celebrity class and political elite today. Her girls also demand top-dollar and perform at the aforementioned nightclub.  The most interesting of her girls is Itsani (Sunset Thomas), who will befriend the undercover cop Will (Mitchell Scott).  Will wants to meet Shannon probably because he thinks she is the serial killer. He has cuffs ready for her, but we are not sure if they are for the arrest or...well, never mind.

Will also has a backstory.  His GF died 10 years ago and he sort of went bonkers when that happened. Now he is deep into the BDSM world and infatuated by his latest suspect, the mysterious Shannon. Flashbacks are prurient and do fill out the plot and explain what is really going on. Where does this all lead?  This film starts out incredibly deviant, ramps it up several degrees, and then presents a final reveal that is so prurient and deviant that you will need a shower to wash the memory of it off.  Nudity, whipping, humiliation, threesomes, foursomes, fivesomes, and the taboo will cascade into the plot even if you are not asking for it.

Is Shannon the killer?  Is Will really interested in catching the killer?  Are the two tragic backstories at all connected?  Not for everyone, but Ms. Dutch is 100% into her performance and carries the film. If you need some prurient movie viewing to let you know that you are not as deviant as you thought...or to give you some ideas that you probably should not come up with, see "Death Dancers."

Camp Pleasant Lake, Brother and Sister with Big Knives

Great cast and great body count.  How many?  Dozens...maybe 40 or 50, most offed with a very big knife in this slasher epic.  Oh, a fine cast of peeps you want to see...like Michael Pare and Devanny Pinn, and standouts from Mahal Empire films like Robert LaSardo.  Nostalgic for those 80 slasher film tropes?  Here they are...set at a summer camp by the lake with counselors and stupid campers, and killers who relish in gutting them....oh yeah, Michael Pare is in it...I guess I said that. Our feature today is 2024's "Camp Pleasant Lake," directed by Thomas Walton.

22 years ago a lot of bad stuff happened, and I'm not talking about the Bush Administration.  In brief, a great looking couple, Ruby (Leila Almas Rose) and John (James Di Giacomo) are headed to a marriage counseling retreat but first need to drop their two children off at summer camp.  They barely get there after being traumatized by a weird, perverted, and sadistic family. Mom and dad will be murdered in humiliating fashion by the weird family in which Angel (LaSardo) and Lou (Mike Ferguson) will noose them. The kids?  Echo and Jasper?  Humiliation and horror await them at camp.  Present day, Echo (Kelly Lynn Reiter) and Jasper (Jonathan Lipnicki) are back...as killers that hang around that camp.  The camp? New owners!  Rick (Pare) and his wife have turned it into a horror camp themed after the horror that took place 22 years ago.  The horror that took place?  It will be replayed now, with the new campers and counselors.

Supposedly, the campers and counselors will endure the horror of the kind little Echo and Jasper endured long ago.  They don't know that those two kids are back as psycho adults, and both have big knives. Oh, remember that weird family, which included Angel and Lou?  They are still around.  The adults that need killing, in the minds of Echo and Jasper, number almost 60.  Certainly, in a 90 minute movie these two psychos won't get to all 60? Or will they?  The knives get plenty of use, as does torture, and various other slasher weapons.  A lot here, and the confluence of horrible events that occurred 22 years ago are gone into in great detail.

We should note the performance of Devanny Pinn.  Her scene toward the end of the film is classic slasher horror, and merits some sort of Oscar. Okay, the death count is high, but will Michael Pare survive this slasher onslaught?  Just what happened to Echo and Jasper over the past 22 years?  Do the counselors and campers deserve their fates?  For dozens of bloody stabbings, and twisted backstories, see "Camp Pleasant Lake."   

Obsession, A Cheating Couple Tormented

Many times one cannot blame the murderer...at least in films.  As in life, in movies, the victim so often deserved their fate.  A cheating spouse, the slick boyfriend/girlfriend of that spouse...they have it coming. We may not advocate murder, but some people just need killing.  You probably know many of them.  Our feature today is 1949's "Obsession" (aka "The Hidden Room"), directed by Edward Dmytryk and filmed at Pinewood Studios in England.

We like Clive (Robert Newton), a gentleman who smokes cigar and sips wine at a men's club in London. One night, the wealthy doctor, supposedly on a long business trip, arrives home to catch his lovely wife, Storm (Sally Gray) and her lover Bill (Phil Brown), an American. Uh oh, Clive has a gun.  Does he shoot them? That would be too easy and below what is expected of a gentleman. No...he slaps Storm, she leaves the room, and at gunpoint takes Bill away. To where and to do what with?  Kill him? Not so simple. See, Clive has it all worked out and has figured out how to commit the perfect murder. Now Clive owns the cheating Storm.  He watches her closely and she dares not cross him fearing he is a killer.  But is he?  Storm believes Clive has murdered her lover.

Well, guess what. Clive is not yet a killer...but intends to be.  The gentleman is keeping the gadabout American alive in a room in bomb out ruins in London.  No one will hear him scream and Bill is also chained.  Uh oh for Bill...Clive is an amateur mad scientist and is working on disposal of body techniques.  So why is Clive not killing Bill? The gentleman torments his wife's lover while feeding him and providing daily martinis.  Months go by and...well, Clive seems to have the perfect plan. But wait!  Inspector Finsbury (Naunton Wayne) shows up on routine inquiries.  Here is all you have to know; Insp. Finsbury is the English version of Colombo.  Enough said.

Why is Clive keeping Bill alive?  Has Clive really figured how to get away with the perfect murder?  Does Bill have any shot at escaping and surviving to the end credits?  This film is reminiscent of the old Hammer films before they switched to horror.  Clever, witty, and perhaps a lesson to all those figuring on cheating on a spouse who is smarter than you.  See "Obsession" and decide for yourself if you like the ending. 

Alien Invasion: Rise of the Phoenix, Michael Pare is in it!

Okay, a hard movie to defend.  So here it is...Michael Pare is in it!  There! We like Michael Pare.  I admit he does jump off a cliff in the Grand Canyon early on and...splat!  But how many actors can pull that off? Remember, he didn't even do that in "Eddie and the Cruisers" or "Streets of Fire."  Well, maybe not literally.  In this film, he does.  It was so magical and his form was pretty good. Also, the babe actresses in this film are infinitely better actresses than Carrie Fisher was. As far as being interesting, this film is infinitely better than that "Star Wars" Mandalorian garbage.  Our feature today is 2025's "Alien Invasion: Rise of the Phoenix," directed by Stefano Milla.

Alice (Melissa Rokuskie) is a babe geologist or anthropologist with a team in the Arizona desert.  Above, in a space-lab is her sister, the babe scientist June (Jennifer Mischiati). Both have hunks on their teams and we do wish for them to enjoy some passion with them...but back to the story. Alice and June are about to see their life work pay off...or not.  Yep, they undertake something many of us undertake in our youth... teleportation.  These experiments always go so well,  so when this one has weird side effects, the two babes will be surprised.  Back on Earth, Alice has a team member, Cory (Charles von Swayze) ogling her and he will get to work with her trying to get rid of the hordes of tree monsters and the Godzilla-sized rock monster.  Wait!  Did I fail to mention all that?

June, romances no one, and that's too bad.  She stays in a no-gravity room for much of the film and romance in one of those would have conjured up images of Roger Moore doing Lois Chiles. June must now grab a flame thrower and battle a tree monster and other slimy aliens that have invaded her space-lab.  Okay, I admit, I have left out a lot, but just given what I have told you, don't you want to see this film?  Again, June and Alice are babes.  Did I mention the Godzilla-sized rock monster heading toward Phoenix?  Oh, that dive Michael Pare did off the cliff rivals Harrison Ford's dive off the dam in "The Fugitive," except we like Michael Pare.

Will the sultry Alice forget about her rocks and plant a deep wet one on the shy Cory?  Will June and her flamethrower incinerate the tree monster and are flamethrowers a good idea on space stations? So what are the dynamics that June gets to be in space and Alice is stuck in the rocks in the desert, and are they such that a catfight may be brewing?  Monsters, Michael Pare, flamethrowers, space-babes, anthropologist babes, and Cory the hunk...all good reason to watch "Alien Invasion: Rise of the Phoenix."