Okay...fine be that way. Call 2022's "Shark Side of the Moon" the worst film ever made. Go ahead with all your negative vibes. Now for you open minded blokes, let us take a serious look at this Tubi Original (The Asylum) film directed by Glenn Campbell (no, not that one) and Tammy Klein. Perhaps this is an appropriately bad film as it concerns itself with NASA and the U.S. space program (a joke in itself). Either way, let us not get too into the plot lest we betray our ability to understand this epic.
Back in 1984 the Soviet went in a different direction with their space program. Instead of shuttles, they manufactured mutant humanoid hammerhead sharks. Makes sense. Hey, we should talk...we in the U.S. were bent on a useless and senseless space shuttle. The hammerhead humanoids get loose and take s spaceship to the moon. Present day, NASA is launching a ship to the moon with a really stupid and whiny crew. The expedition will begin to colonize the moon and plant fauna. The captain is the ridiculous Commander Nicole Tress (Maxi Witrak). Just after launch she announces it is her nap time (she probably read Joe Biden's book on leadership). Immediately the ship falls apart and crash lands on the dark side of the moon.
Our whacky commander gives one order after another which all get crew members killed. Finally, she and three unfortunate crewmembers go outside and explore. Turns out the hammerhead mutants have colonized the moon. They are rescued by a grouchy Russian cosmonaut, Sergey (Ego Mikitas) and the half shark half babe gilled beauty Akula (Tania Fox). The hammerhead humanoids desire to destroy the humans, steal their ship and take it back to Earth to conquer. Nicole continues to demonstrate incompetence and her crew gets eaten one by one because of it. Akula, it turns out, is the sister of the queen of hammerhead mutants (Natasha Goubskay) and the two hate one another. Okay, you get the picture. No more plot...I hear you. Although...the ending? Wow!
Are the evil mutant hammerhead humanoids a metaphor of what awaits our incompetent and weaponized civilization as we enter serious space exploration? Is the incompetent Commander Tress a metaphor for Elon Musk and his very subsidized ideas about space exploration? Are the makers of this film poignant in suggesting Sea World is a perfect metaphor for this mortal coil we call life. See it to believe it...especially the last 10 minutes..."Shark Side of the Moon."
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