Okay...I know. This isn't the most inspiring horror film ever made. The characters? Sure...we want them all to die. Annoying, shrill, and stupid. The family portrayed has as much tenderness as a seasick crocodile. Still...there's that one scene. The Christmas carolers scene. How beautiful it was. An out of tune choir of nerds singing Christmas carols we have never heard of. The singers, dweeb men and dweeb women, unable to develop a third chord (or even a 2nd chord), butchering holiday music on the front stoop of a sad house filled with sad people. What can save a movie? Yes! Homicidal strings of Christmas lights! Christmas lights that strangle, electrocute, and impale with icicles. Buy those at Home Depot next year! Today we look at 2016's "The Elf," directed by Tristan Price.
Victoria (Natassia Halabi) is a babe with a useless boyfriend. See, Nick (Gabriel Miller), a sad hunk, killed his dad on Christmas when he was nine. Yep, stabbed the old guy dozens of times and then stabbed his mom in the face a dozen times. Victoria thought it would be a good idea to date him. The mental health system in this country is so good...why not? But wait? Is that what happened? See, an ancestor of Nick was a toymaker who created an elf doll that came to life. The elf had a knife and went homicidal when evil forces breathed life into it. That's Nick's story and he's sticking to it. Many years later, Nick and Victoria are engaged and have brought a weird green house together.
Okay, Victoria, knowing Nick hates Christmas, invites her whole family over for a Christmas Eve party. Oh, the family hates Nick. I will say that Victoria's sister, Tiffany (Lisa May), is a babe who has "I'M GOING TO DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH" written all over her. The shrill family seem like they are there for an intervention. Then comes the little elf doll with his little knife. One by one, in gory fashion, the elf offs the shrill family. Then the Christmas caroler scene...and we cheer. Call it holiday cheer. The little elf has no mercy, not even for the beautiful.
Is the elf really the killer, or is Nick sick in the head? Does Tiffany stand a chance at surviving the knife wielding Santa's helper? Even without the elf or the murders, is Victoria's family right about Nick? Twists abound and the elf's little knife will make you smile. You'll never go caroling again after seeing this film. For a wooden Christmas horror film with a saving scene, see "The Elf."
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