Tail Sting, Big Scorpions on a Plane

You gals will empathize with Courtney (Tara Price). The pretty karate girl seeks a guy who is mildly interesting and breathing. Unfortunately, on Oceanic Airlines Flight 1443, from Melbourne to LAX, she'll only meet losers, vampire/Goth wannabes, and monster bugs. Then there is sultry stewardess Patti (Jean Carol). She'll die horribly, so we won't mention her again. Oh yes, "Tail Sting" receives a rating of 2.3/10 on IMDB...elitist dweebs! This 2001 film, I think we can all agree, is better than any film released by the major studios in 2019.

Yep...in addition to the very pretty and perky Courtney, a team of scientists boards this flight to L.A. Yep again...they bring their experiment on board. Yep...the experiment gets loose and pretty soon there are a dozen monster scorpions ripping apart stewardesses. The buggers will go through the crew like crap through a goose, and then start on the passengers. The only surviving crew member is pilot Jack (Robert Merrill). He will be chased out of the cockpit by the queen bug. On the bright side, now that he is out of the cockpit he will fall in love with the blonde nubile scientist Jennifer (Laura Putney). As the film progresses they will make goo-goo eyes at each other and she will get increasingly less clothed.

Okay, Jennifer's ex-beau is also on the scientific team. He wants the scorpions alive as he is ready to sell them to some country as weapons. He has a gun so he calls the shots. As the passengers decrease in numbers and the demise of the pretty stewardess Patti ends coffee service, the chances of making it to L.A. seem dim. Now Jennifer and Jack share more tender moments and Jennifer turns into Ripley (you know, the chick from "Alien"). As Jack must maneuver the gun-toting ex-beau of Jennifer, and monster scorpions, he must also get back in the cockpit and maneuver the plane to L.A.

Courtney's Australian accent will win all you guys over, but so will the perky Jennifer as she sheds her garments. This is a fantastic big-bug-monster-movie with beefcake and cheesecake galore, though most of that cake will be eaten by insects. Will Oceanic Airlines Flight 1443 make it to L.A.? Will Jack and Jen survive and have pre-marital sex? Just how many garments will Jennifer shed? For some nifty bug fun on a flight that runs out of coffee, see "Tail Sting," directed by Paul Wynne.