Monday, September 15, 2014

The Ghost Galleon, Lingerie Models in Peril

Noemi (Barbara Rey) is one of the top lingerie models in Europe.  Bikinis and lingerie are her thing. Tall, blonde, elegant, statuesque, and sassy; Noemi (see picture below) is about to have the most horrifying 24 hours of any horror film character, in history.  Noemi's lesbian lover, Kathy (Blanca Estrada), is also a sexy model, and is missing.  In her pursuit to find Kathy, Noemi is beat up, raped, kidnapped, humiliated, chased by Satanic ghosts of Templar knights, and finally cut to pieces on an altar....all while wearing underwear and high heels.  This is of course the fourth installment of the "Tombs of the Blind Dead" series, 1974's "The Ghost Galleon."
Directed by Amando de Ossorio, "The Ghost Galleon" is a perfect vehicle for our beloved ghost knights.  As the film begins, two models are participating in a publicity stunt for a sporting goods manufacturer.  The bikini clad babes, Kathy (see picture below) and Lorena (Margarita Merino) intentionally run out of gas in their motorboat, with the intention of being rescued.  The plan is that the news media will take lots of pictures of the two rescued babes, and those babes will be wearing bikinis from a certain manufacturer.  Free publicity.  Uh oh, our damsels enter a strange mist that hauls them into a different dimension (I know we've all been there).  Out of gas, our first two victims make it over to an 18th century derelict galleon.  First Lorena climbs aboard, and meets the unforgiving ghosts.  Then Kathy goes to look for Lorena, and she is also ritualistically pulled apart.
With her lover missing, Noemi quizzes her boss, Lillian (Maria Perschy).  Lillian introduces Noemi to Tucker, chief of advertising for the sporting goods manufacturer. Tucker (Jack Taylor) is afraid Noemi will go to the police, so he has Sergio , his henchman, beat her up, rape her, and bring her on their voyage to find Kathy and Lorena.  Lillian plots to toss Noemi into the middle of the Atlantic on this voyage, as witnesses can be so inconvenient.  Out of nowhere, the creepy galleon emerges, and our unlucky rescuers board it.  Misty and creaky, the galleon contains ten coffins of Templar knights, and Satanic adornments hung around them.  As the knights rise out of their coffins, our rescue party plots to steal the treasures on the ship, and find a way back to civilization. 
Just as the knights seem unstoppable, our sporting goods crew figures out how to do makeshift exorcisms.  Will their new found knowledge and strategy be in time to defeat the Satanic stalkers and return to the right dimension?  If watching beautiful, scantily clad, and terrified damsels fleeing from evil fiends is a plot device to your liking, "The Ghost Galleon" is for you.  This film is available in semi-good quality on YouTube.  In an era of strong female protagonists, this throwback horror film might seem a guilty pleasure type of way. 

1 comment:

  1. This movie is screaming for a remake, starring yours truly.