Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Blood Glacier, The Hills are Alive with the sound of Mutants

Horror films set in the Alps are usually really good (see my review of "The Crawling Eye" on Dec. 3rd).  2013's "Blood Glacier" (aka "Blutgletscher") is the wildest of these films.  Heavy on monsters and gore, and somewhat reminiscent of John Carpenter's "The Thing," today's blog entry is now available on Netflix.  Made in Austria, "Blood Glacier" is filled with colorful characters, many of which meet gruesome fates.
The plot:  High on a mountain in the Alps, scientists in a climate research lab are tending to experiments.  When a piece of equipment stops transmitting, Janek (Gerhard Liebmann), a drunk scientist, goes to investigate.  He finds that a nearby glacier seems to be stained in blood.  While investigating, his dog is bitten by a mutant fox.  Back at the lab, the blood substance is tested and appears to be billions of one celled organisms.  Meanwhile, Janek comes across a fox/beetle hybrid, and drives it away.  Because of his proclivity to imbibe, no one believes him.  Meanwhile, Janek's ex-wife, the very beautiful Tanja (Edita Malovcic) is working for Austria's Climate Minister.  Tanja is bringing the Minister (Brigitte Kren) up the mountain to witness the effects of global warming.  The Minister is a beastly woman, and our hope is she gets eaten by lots of mutants.
Anything that eats the red snow will turn into a hybrid.  As Tanja leads the political entourage up the mountain, they are attacked by a falcon/mosquito hybrid.  As the scientists in the lab are gloating because of their discovery, Janek realizes the danger.  As monstrous insects are discovered, two scientists, Falk (Peter Knaack) and Birte (Hille Beseler) return to the glacier...big mistake!  Now fleeing from the mosquito monster, Tanja and her party reach the lab.  The Minister then tries to calm her party down by shrieking "STOP EATING THAT BANANA WHILE YOU'RE CRYING!" to her beautiful aide, Irene (Adina Vetter).  This line wins first place in the "Did She Really Say That" contest.  As the scientists and the Minister's entourage are trapped in the small lab, a ram/Godzilla hybrid attacks. The Minister fends it off with a power drill, but this victory is short lived.  Janek and Tanja (pictured above) realize they must come up with a plan and act. 
With heroics by Tanja and Janek, a few weird plot twists, more gore and carnage, an eerie conclusion awaits.  Is the boorish Minister a metaphor for the increasing rancor which is engulfing the Austrian parliament?  Did Christopher Plummer and Julie Andrews meet any of these creatures when they fled Nazi occupied Austria?  "Blood Glacier" is a lot of fun, and lots of monsters are utilized.  As the winter approaches, this is the perfect film to prepare you for more frigid temperatures. 

2 comments:

  1. Hello Zisi! Great review! I would now like to see this movie. : )

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  2. This is my third attempt to comment, so hopefully not all three go through. I am thinking I may take my INSANITY workout break day to watch this. After all, I have a strange thing for girls whose last names end in "ic" or "ova."

    ~Dustin

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