Alligator 2: The Mutation

Gotta love mutations in our films.  Beats fields of flowers.  Gotta love alligators in our films.  Beats unicorns.   Gotta love dynamite and rocket launchers in our films.  Beats baguettes and Chardonnay.  Gotta love corrupt mayors and shady real estate developers in our films.  Beats former boyfriends and supportive best friends.  Today we have a man's movie!  Our feature today is 1991's "Alligator 2: The Mutation," directed by Jon Hess.

Two blokes diving outside a sewer runoff for fish are eaten by the mutation. Bummer.  Seems Vinnie (Steve Railsback) is a real estate developer trying to inflict his real estate plan on this Florida town.  He corrupts the mayor (Bill Daily). Now cop David (Joseph Bologna) is on the case when some kid finds one of the diver's legs. Yep, was no boating accident.  David sends the leg to the lab where his wife is the scientist.  Christine (Dee Wallace) tells him it was no boating accident.  Now David tries to get the mayor to call off a festive carnival that will be held by the lake.  The mayor refuses and Vinnie tells the mayor to get rid of the persistent cop. The big alligator, feasting on dumped chemicals eats a homeless encampment.

Rookie cop, Rich (Woody Brown) joins David on his quest to find and kill the monster gator.  His GF is the mayor's daughter, Sheri (Holly Gagnier). Vinnie and the mayor call in a renown gator hunter, Hawk (Richard Lynch) and his boys.  They bring dynamite.  David and Rich already tried dynamite...didn't work. Go figure.  Now Hawk and his boys join forces with the cop duo as the babes, Christine and Sheri, try to stay out of the way and still try to appear useful (a metaphor for successful women in America today).  The gator will get hungrier and decide to go to the carnival.  You can see where this is all going.

Will the cop duo or the gator hunter team kill the mutation?  Will Sheri or Christine actually do anything useful in killing the gator or will they wait at home preparing a pot for gator stew?  Will our real estate developer meet a predictable fate or become the ReMax broker of the year?  This is a fun one.  The cast is sensational and it is always good to see a mutation and a gator, never mind if they are combined into one monster!  See "Alligator 2: The Mutation," and know you have added a level of testosterone in your chemical make-up.

You Shouldn't Have Let Me In, American Babes in Italy Shredded by a Vampire

We have an erotic one today.  An erotic vampire one. What makes a movie erotic.  Well, a few things.  The babes have to be sultry and the guys have to be hunks.  The hunks and babes have to engage in deviant and prolonged pre-marital sex.  The gals need some gratuitous lingerie and very tight slinky garments. Stilettos will help. The guys? Six-pack abs and they have to grunt a lot.  A Tubi Original has captured our arousal factor today, 2024's "You Shouldn't Have Let Me In," directed by Dave Parker.

The sultry but shallow social media influencer, Rochelle (Isabella Egizi), is getting married in Italy.  She rents an old Italian villa/mansion for her bachelorette party. Her buddy, the very sultry Jenny (Anastasiya Bogach) is already there and sultry redhead Kelsey (Diana Gardner) has just arrived.  Breanna (Giulia Nunnari), the sultry party girl in the tight party dress and stilettos?  Already eaten by a vampire at the nightclub she was at last night...so sad. Some tenseness seeps into this reunion of the babes here in Italy. Seems Rochelle (who has over a million followers on Instagram) stole her fiancé Richard (David Nurra) from Kelsey. Oh, also arriving is Blake (Nathaniel Ansbach), the gay friend. The party gets going. Then an invite from the owner of the villa, Victor (Fabian Castro). He's a vampire, but the gals don't know it yet. Meet at a trendy nightclub...the same one Breanna was eaten at.

The booming Techno Rock seems to hypnotize these gals to some semi-lesbian behavior.  There, Victor, the vampire, sets his eyes on Kelsey and entrances her.  He convinces the gals to invite him and his vampire henchmen back to the villa. There, Kelsey will have deviant sex with Victor, Rochelle and Jenny will share some lesbian passion, but not before sex with the two henchmen.  Now Victor moves in to change Kelsey.  How does this go?  Ha!  You'll see. Oh, Blake!  The gay guy!  Guess who else is gay. The sacred knight who's life's mission it is to slay vampires, Dario (Riccardo Angelini). Quite the hunk too, though not a great sacred knight.  It is difficult to find good sacred knights in Europe since the formation of the EU.  There will be passionate pre-marital sex.  Deviant sex.  Lingerie peeled off and thrown across the room. Babes running in stilettos fleeing bloodsuckers. Blood. Throat cuttings. Throats ripped out.

Will Victor be able to turn Kelsey into his vampire bride?  Will Rochelle shed her materialism and narcissism and help save Kelsey from the entrancing vampire?  Why does Tubi or Hollywood seem allergic to making movies with such high babe-factors?  Well, this one has the cheesecake and beefcake which movies of late seem to avoid.  For some erotic bloodsucking, see "You Shouldn't Have Let Me In."  

Flesh Eaters, Cannibalistic Mutants in the Swamp

Cannibalistic mutants in the swamp!  A mad scientist! A babe searches for her missing babe sister! Extra-marital sex! A green, long-toothed monster!  Okay, this one is less than low-budget.  Perhaps it is a C film instead of a B film.  Whatever the budget, this one is infinitely better than the crap that is "Star Wars" and "Mandalorian" idiocy.  It is also a far more attractive thing than Taylor Swift.  Today we look at the James Ian Mair film, 2022's "Flesh Eaters."

As the film begins a babe wandering into the swamp is torn to pieces and eaten by mutant Akro (Benjamin Mair). Fast forward, Bella (Tara Bixler) is screwing her sister's hubby, Brandon (Jed Brian). The sister, Emma (Jordan Leigh Wheatley) is a nice gal but suspects her husband is messing around. Bella and her buddy, Gretchen (Sunny King), then go into the swamp to attend a party. Everyone at the party has been ripped apart by Akro, but this mutant captures Gretchen and Bella and brings him back to the lab where Dr. Trenton (Jeff Angel) turns people into these cannibalistic green mutants. He does this to Gretchen and soon he will do it to Bella.

Emma and Brandon trudge into the swamp and almost get murdered by Akro. A scientist, Jack (Grant Karazsia), investigating these murders, saves them. Now Akro goes back to the lab. Oh!  Bella does become a mutant and will strangle the nurse (Jamie Angel) with a human intestine.  The final confrontation is inevitable.  Not only when Jack and Emma meet the mad scientist and the mutants, but also when Emma confronts Brandon about him boinking her sister. Bodily organs will be ripped out and tossed about and eaten. A mad scientist will inject glowing green fluid into helpless babes.  Brandon will get what he deserves.

Will a catfight occur between Emma and Bella?  Will Akro find love with one of these babes?  Will an army of these mutants be able to defeat the Houthis or the Taliban?  This is a good one with some cheesecake and gore.  For a terrific C movie effort, see the very fun "Flesh Eaters."